Chronicles Of ...

Hunger...

2007-09-05T00:45:00.001+08:00

I have no idea what has been going on in my head, but I have been making very unforgivable mistakes, both during and outside of work.

They include:

1) Making blatant(unforgivable) grammatical errors in almost all the blog comments which I had been posting.

2) Getting figures(the numerical kind) wrong.

3) Mixing up clients and their respective projects.

Now, Pt 1) is fine with me, after all, the worst that people can think of me, is that my England can barely make it. Not that mine is any good in the first place.

But Pt 2) and 3) are severe. They are potentially extremely hazardous to my career and at this point in my life, I cannot be making such mistakes.

Not in this job and definitely even more for whatever I am going for next.

I have to start pushing myself to be a perfectionist.

Talk about "perfectionist". Just a quick one since I do not have much time tonight. Actually, I do not much time every other night lately. Time has been spent fulfilling-ly though.

Recently, I met this other guy on a project. Two years younger than me and a government scholar. Maybe you can call it fate and perhaps I felt like a brotherly figure to him, but we kinda hit it off and are on good terms.

Put it simply, in him, I have realised what I have been lacking all along, that has been constantly plaguing me so far. And that is the "perfectionist" attitude, or rather the drive for perfection.

Unlike me, he is always looking to pass the harshest of critique upon his own work. Unlike me, he never holds back punches, until he has really push himself to the max. Despite having covered all the necessary details on our project, he would slave on until his eyes or his concentration totally wear.

Being someone who has always believe himself to be smart, I have always been plagued by under-achievements. And right there, staring back at me, is the realisation of what I have not been doing right. Its my attitude towards success that requires some over-hauling.

To succeed, the greatest of hunger is not going to get you anywhere unless you are backing it up with actions. And actions alone mean nothing, if they are not going to guarantee results in your favour. And how are you going to ensure that those results are going to be 100% positive? Well, you can't. BUT, you just gotta squeeze for that marginal single percent of positivity that you can work for and leave the rest to God.

How do you squeeze every single %? Well, thats where you let your hunger flair.

P.S~ Hungry. Should I finish the "Missy Donuts" on the dining table or cook instant noodles?

Show us the money...

2007-08-12T15:46:00.000+08:00

In yesterday's papers, there was another article on the decline of takers for engineering scholarships, with people preferring more glamourous and rewardings careers in business and finance.

Not anything new that we do not know and I was sniggering as I read it.

To this, I only have one simple thing to say.

Fuck you. Show us the money.

The Black Parade...

2007-07-16T23:13:00.000+08:00

Not the latest song around. Once in awhile, there comes a song that makes you want to shout out loud, bang your head and smash your guitar(or buy 1 to smash).

Let it all out.

A Byul(Star) is born...

2007-07-06T01:18:00.000+08:00

I have not been updating this blog for more than a month.

I thought it will be nice to slot in something. If you notice, there is a Widget on the top-left corner of this blog. It will play "Byul" for your listening pleasure.

There are 2 reasons for it being there:

1) This song is very beautiful. Just like Kim Ah-Joong, who had starred in the movie "200 pounds beauty".

2) I do not know how to align it with the blog layout since the code for this widget is a cut-n-paste. Thus, it probably looks out-of-place. Then again, on hindsight, I think I will leave it in its supposely awkward position as this song does warrant a right to stand out from this blog, rather than fitting in as a part of it.

For those who had seen this movie, you would probably understand and feel for this song. For those who don't and do not have a heart cum tear-duct of stone, I could recommend. You can get this DVD from some leading neighbourhood DVD stores(Read TS).

If there is a message behind this movie, its just that the society we live in, is too conscious of image and looks. It does pay to take a step back and reflect on whether your treatment to others has been too biased for superficial reasons.

On the other hand, we do understand that it is only human nature to admire what is beautiful and I believe everyone has a right to pursue beauty. For those peaching on right-or-wrong on plastic surgery, who are they to tell others that they should stay ugly if that is the hand they were dealt, when there is clearly an alternative out of it.

Being beautiful does not guarantee happiness, but I guess it does contribute to some extent to your feeling abit better each day.

After all, isn't Life all about pursuing what you deem as perfect for yourself?

You don't deserve less. Remember that.

Signing off.

Invalid Denial to Re-entry at St.James Powerstation...

2007-05-31T12:32:00.000+08:00

Something unpleasant happened at St. James Powerstation in the wee hours of this morning which left a sour taste in our mouths.

To cut the long story short, we had spent the earlier part of the night drinking at the Gallery Bar, following which we adjourned to Tiger Live Room. It was 1:00a.m. when we were at Tiger's re-entry queue where we were denied re-entry.

And the reason for the denial? Two of my friends were wearing T-shirts.

Visible stunned by this excuse for a second, it was not tough to voice our protest on the spot. There were people in T-shirts all over Tiger Live Room. I pointed to a guy in the main queue(not my re-entry queue) and asked the female staff(whose name was given as Zila),"We can't go in because we are wearing non-collared T-shirts. So are you saying that he cannot go in too, since he is wearing a non-collared T-shirt."

To which she answered,"We will allow him in if the management allows."

My friend pointed to someone inside the club and said,"He is wearing a non-collared T-shirt, why can he get inside and we can't."

To which she answered,"His T-shirt is different from yours."

That ended after she asked for our IC and she claimed that she will asked the Management whether she can let us in.

What crab?!

What can our IC tell her, that will over-ride "her house-rule" of "no non-collared T-shirts allowed entry", other than the fact that we are of legal age to drink? If you ask me for my credit card just so you can check on my credit limit, it might still have made slight sense.

That totally spoiled the night. All my years(make that a decade) since I started clubbing, I had never come across a denial to re-entry that was so hard to swallow. It was made worst by the fact that it took place at a club which we had been frequenting, chalking up spendings in the hundreds each week.

It was acceptable to be told of a Full-House and we had to be turned away. That would have left us with no grounds for argument. In this case, the excuses dished out was simply not acceptable as there was no consistency across the board. To put it directly, we were discriminated blatantly.

We have lodged a complaint and will see to it that St.James' Management gives us an answer. Failing which, we will not hesitate to bring this matter up on public forums.

Snow Patrol - Signal Fire

2007-05-05T01:34:00.000+08:00

This song is beautiful. Snow Patrol rulez. I love the lyrics.

'The perfect words never crossed my mind
'cause there was nothing in there but you'

Passion...

2007-04-07T14:00:00.000+08:00

Last night, I was on my way home and I drove past this huge scale funeral held at a house along Mountbatten Road. Now, that... was a funeral of the largest scale I have ever set my eyes on. Usually, whenever I pass a funeral, I will avoid looking at it as a practice since young. This time, I couldn't resist turning my head a few times to check it out. I was thinking this guy who had died, must be somebody(influential and very rich).

This morning, I saw him on the Obituary. Presumably its him since the wake was at Mountbatten and his took up 2 pages of the Obi. I paused for awhile just to think about this guy's life. What could he have possibly done to have "made it in life" and would he have it any other way? Towards the last few days, could he have wished that his life had gotten the recognition that it should have received? Maybe say, made into a movie? Now, I would like MINE to be made into a movie. Anyway, I sum up the questions into "How would your life be worth living?"

I know God loves me. He does answer me, out of the blue and with efficiency.

I just came across this photoblog entry. And it seems to fit.

"What is your passion?" is the next clue to the former query.

Dialect Groups...

2007-03-24T13:10:00.000+08:00

If there is one thing that I don't feel for or comprehend as a Singaporean, is peoples' need to know about your dialect group, outside of curiosity.

Hokkien, Teochew, Hakka, Cantonese... they make no forking difference to me. How many proud Hokkiens around have actually been to Fu Jian or Teochew to Chao Zhou? If anything, it only reminds of how the Chinese use to wage civil wars and how much more advance they could have been if they were not so preoccupied in vying for the Indian Chief post, neglecting to unite against external threats until situations were foregone. This to me, is not a very proud thing to admit as a Chinese.

We look the same, live in the same estates, use the same currency and eat the same things anyway.

Of course, there is always one reason why I appreciate the diversity of Chinese dialects . Its the distinctive cuisines that come from all these different dialect groups that I come to sample as the privilege of a born-and-breed Singaporean.

Now, Teochew porridge, Hokkien fried mee, Hakka Yong Tau Foo and Cantonese Dim Sum.... I heart Chinese.

Civil Engineering Sucks...

2007-03-19T00:17:00.000+08:00

The frequency to which I am updating my entries to this blog is probably a testament to how much longer it will be sustained, after all, actions(or rather the lack of) speak louder than words. Just thought I'll sneak in this entry and clear abit of cobwebs.

For the past few years, I have been living in disgruntle from some wrong decisions which I have made. Mainly the Civil Engineering Degree which I have taken. To start with, all the promised talks about having value-add that an engineer can give to the society and whatever pitch talks of "The best goes to civil", turn out to be blatant lies from my first pay cheque as a civil engineer to the turn of tide of the popularity of my discipline.

While my peers in Finance industry can probably predict a 5 figure salary in 2,3 years time, I see experienced "PROFESSIONAL" engineers struggling to hit 7,8k. You can't blame society for that. People in finance, bring in the money directly. Engineers do not bring in the money for you. Engineering is all about safety, which equates cost, hints liability. People don't pay you for saving their lives when they aien't dead yet but you don't mind giving you a slice of the pie if you can make them richer directly.

And one more thing which I feel I should do for society and namely, kiddos still in school. Spread the word, engineering sucks as a career. Please, unless you are some academic geek who wouldn't mind having your fortune capped by some research fund, I advise you to ply your trade elsewhere.

All I know for myself, is that I always have a hunger to succeed, although I have been pretty lost for the past few years. And I intend to do something about it. How I will go about doing it, I don't intend to disclose at this point in time. I may not be guaranteed success, but it sure beat rotting under the piece of toilet paper has "Bachelor in Civil & Strutural Engineering" on it.

Pui!

P.S. On hindsight, the tone above seems pretty strong. But rest assure, I am typing this entry without much of an expression on my face. Its simply something on my mind that has been around when I graduated 4 years ago. Just thought, now that I'm planning a move into another stage of my life, I'll just throw this out once and for all, never to look back again.

Its a small world afterall...

2007-02-13T19:59:00.000+08:00

I was reading through an earlier posting and saw this particular quote.

"Guess I'll just lap up the bliss while it lasts, nothing is forever anyway, except for diamond, which is utterly useless(except for proposals) by the way."

Sometimes, you should never say never, least you are prepared to eat your words here and then. Don't worry, I'm not getting married. lol.

Anyhow, lately, the emphasis on my most new life realisation, is how small Singapore really is. Apart from the fact that Angel's best friend and her hubby is a close friend of a reservist buddy of mine. And that my insurance agent turns out to be in the same reservist unit as me. I have an interesting and awkward story to share.

On the 14th of February, the wrath of Venus potentially awaits those males, whose other half turns green, on the realisation that they are on the other opposite side of those ladies with roses.
It happened last week, in the build-up to V-day, when every hot-blooded male is looking for the best rose bargain in town.

A friend threw me an offer I couldn't resist,"Call Wendy @ 9888-8888. Say you are Adrian's friend. 1 bouquet for $55, including delivery." Too good to be true, and too cheap to resist. I had to call no matter what.

So I dialed. No one picked up. Seconds later, my call was returned.

I took initiative in the teleconversation,"Hi. You must be Wendy."

She,"I'm not Wendy. I'm Nancy."

Moi,"Ok, Nancy. I heard you are doing roses?"

She,"Huh? TP, how you know I'm doing roses?! I'm Nancy leh..!"

It took me 5 seconds to register, that I KNOW this Nancy. Apparently, I was using a new phone, hence her number did not appear in the Caller ID when I dialed her number.

Now, this is not too bad still, until the awkwardness of the situation sinked in.

For you see, Nancy is the best-friend of the girl whom I turned down not too long ago due to "emotions unavailability". And yet, a month or two later, here I was, sending flowers and kisses to another girl through Nancy.

Now, I can only pray that when the flowers show up tomorrow, at least the Roses look like Roses and the leaves are green.

A trip on the beach...

2007-01-30T20:48:00.000+08:00

Last Saturday, I picked Angel up and we did not know where else to venture to. Thus, we made our way to the new Cafe Del Mar, Sentosa. Even the occasional light showers were merely threats to what would be a great evening, breezy and all.

So there we were. Parked by the Beach Station and wola! There was a cute shuttle bus ferrying cool people to Cafe Del Mar(CDM). CDM was really nice, open with lotsa space though it felt a tad barren probably because Saturday just aien't a clubbin' night.

From the indoor section, we ventured to the outdoor where there were beach chairs and beds all over, though none unoccupied. In our orientation round the Beach de la cafe, a familiar voice called my name. I turned around to see a friend, fellow blogger to be exact. Much as I was happy to see my friend, a fear within me stirred. It did not take long for my worst to be realised.

I introduced both parties.

My friend, in her opening line,"Hi, Angel...... do you blog?"

At that moment, time stood still. There were a lot of energetic caucasian males frolicking around that corner and I was standing there, hoping for one of them to run by, accidentally slip and knock me out in the process.

A second later. Not a single male came to my rescue.

I tried to ease off the situation by pretending I did not hear anything. We carried on the casual meetup conversation and bid our farewell.

Any gal with an average intellect can deduce what my friend's question had implied.

Angel,"So you blog. You did not tell me."

"Why did she ask that? She must have assumed you met me through blogging. Do you meet alot of girls from blogging?"

Hell yeah.

I had the whole night to explain why I did not want her to know about this blog. For one thing, this blog isn't 100% me. To be honest, some parts of this blog aien't even me. This is a sketchpad for whatever little creativity I possess and a field for some emotions to run wild, overboard. With some of these thoughts and some embaressing history of mine, if I have a choice, I would not have any friend know about this blog.

This is the main reason why I do not meet any more bloggers. And also the reason why i choose to keep most of whatever little blogging friends I have, at a comfortable distance.

True be told, I have nothing to hide in this blog. Just a little privacy is all I need. Just like ladies, wearing their bikini on the beach doesn't neccessary mean that they would not mind having their bikini pictures all over the internet.

Angel will know about this blog in due time. Its just simply not due yet.

Fallen...

2007-01-23T00:14:00.000+08:00

Pardon my absense for the longest time. I had almost forgot the existence of my blog. However, as I check on my last posting moments ago, I realise that it had only been barely 2 weeks since my last posting, hardly an eternity. So much things must have happened since.

Deceased of my grandmother. Severe change of lifestyle(Read- Less club and alcohol) . And a new love interest. Not wanting to bored anyone, I'll only touch on my romance.

As per all of my previous romance, they all start fast and end even faster, and the end result is always a casualty on either/both side. In fact, at one point in time, I had almost given up on lookout for anything special, I dated for the sake of dating.

Each gal, if presentable, will start with 80 points. The rest, is entirely based on demerit points. She hits 50, shes out. You'll probably think,"Stud, how do you know if you never hit 50 yourself?" Thats because I'm smart enough not to get into any battle I can't win, smarty.

Then, along hops in an Angel. Someone whom I should have known aeons ago, but was always eluded. Better late than never. And she is the sweetest girl I have ever known. I believe I appreciate her now more than I would, than if i had met her earlier.

I had met a pretty face too many, but to honestly say that I can fall in love with any of my ex's personalities, probably, none of them will fit the bill as much as Angel. And for the first time in my life, there is actually someone who wants to know me for who I am and always hungry for more. If there was ever going to be a 95 pointer, she is the one.

Although I refuse to say the 3 words, but I know I'm falling in hard. Actually, I'm already beginning to worry when I'll lose her, just like how I lost the rest. Guess I'll just lap up the bliss while it lasts, nothing is forever anyway, except for diamond, which is utterly useless(except for proposals) by the way.

God save me. Maybe, he just did.

Lost Kitty...

2007-01-12T01:07:00.000+08:00

Cats like an adventure once in awhile, at the expense of the ones they own. Just last Saturday, my brother's gf's beloved Shih Tzu came over for a sleep over. Much as the dog, hereby known as ST(to protect his identity) is fascinated with the pussy, hereby know as FF, the admiration doesn't travel both ways. Plus, we were quite sure that FF is jealous of ST. I had to give her a lashing down when she tried to claw ST in his approach. Wasn't sure if she had taken it to heart, but she probably did.

Woke up on Sunday morning to find something amiss when I open my door to see ST on fours, staring right back at me. It was always FF's job to guard my door, she couldn't have allowed ST the honour. One loop round the house and it was official. The bedroom door was slightly ajar, as was the window to the balcony.

A search warrant was issued as we comb the first lap around the house. No luck. Being optimistic, we assumed that she would appear soon after, as per the last time she did a Houdini. It did not work out to be sooner than expected. We had the entire family, in a dull mood, upon the news of his latest venture. In particular, my dad, who despite his harsh words on the troubles of having a cat, appeared to be the most worried.

After some interviews with my neighbours, it seems that the pussy has been sighted in the area. Either enjoying life in the sun, or still lost.

What happened was another night passing without her appearance and the next day, it was decided that something had to be done. Dog whistle was bought(was that desperate), a LED-touch light was invested into.

An intensive search was carried out in the evening and it was finally decided that a search would be performed as follow:

1) Search during wee hours like 2a.m. to 3a.m. as lost domestic(in-house) cats are usually panicky and would stay extremely still in daytime, when they are lotsa sound going around them. They could identify these sound as "danger" signals and would over-ride any "familiar sound" calling out for them. Its a defensive mechanism for cats to concentrate on dangers over any other things at hand.
2) Lost cats are rarely more than 3 house radius from their house.
3) Cats are norturnal. Higher chance of them to moving around at night in search of food.

It did not help that showers had to pour at 2a.m., just before I set off. It had me worried and relieved for the same reason.

1) If she was hiding in the sewage, the rising water level would force her out.
2) Being afraid of water(as per most cats), she'll probably stay hidden in some sheltered corners, rendering my search futile.

Regardless, the search had to go on. It was that night or never, least she venture further from home. I undertook the search, in a slow pace, courtesy of tips from the neighbourfood cat feeder, a nice lady who had 2 dogs and a legion of cat fans in the area. Rather go slow, then give her time to come out, than to go fast and have her coming out to miss you.

Barely ten minutes later, my search was rewarded by a familiar bell ring behind the plants. Moving to the side, and there was my baby, all frightened and still. Took awhile to coo her to get out of the bush, but she did. We were amazed as to how we had missed her throughout our search when she was in fact, so near. But then again, she probably wasn't at that exact spot while we were searching earlier.

Which brings me to the last point.

1) ALWAYS tag your pet with a name, your contact number and BELLS.

Thank God for Bells.

Stolen...

2007-01-11T01:50:00.000+08:00

Invitation only
Grant Farewells
Crash the best one
Of the best ones
Clear liquor and cloudy eyed
Too early to say goodnight

You have stolen my heart
You have stolen my heart

Happy Endings...

2007-01-07T12:50:00.000+08:00

Occasionally I come across a post like this and I am reminded that I am not the only bliss-hungry soul around. We all have an ideal happy ending. Don't give me all the crab of landing your ideal job and netting $770k a year. Now, you would be happy but I wouldn't envision that as an appropriate "ending". The reason why that is an "ideal" job is likely to be the affililated paycheck, which is utterly worthless, unless you know how to spend it.

Now, thats where the fun begins, isn't it?

I would say that my happy ending is a variant of The Acccidental Blowjob's. She specified a nice little house in Bishan/Thomson area, a man whom she can tolerate living with, 2 dogs & 1 cat, hot sex every night. Except, I would prefer a secluded santuary off the usual packed high-rised neighbourhood/urban area, preferably in the low dense sub-urbs. Now, hot compassionate sex every night, few times each round, is definitely a plus. Well, perhaps, 4 times a week, as a realistic demand, for my partner to catch a breather.

Again, whats your happy ending?

While i'm at it, I might as well blog about another thing on my mind.

There is a reason why I find cats fascinating. Being a possessive lover by nature, I have always felt the need to keep the tightest of lease on my partners, physical and emotionally. Time over time, it has proven to be suicidal. Somehow after awhile, I learnt to let it go. Afterall, what is yours, is yours. And love, aien't possession.

Come side-effect, some time later, I think I actually associated love with No possession. And it was realised that a balance was needed. Thats when I came across the nature of cats. You never really own a cat, they are free-willed and you can't force them to do your exact biddings, unlike the ever-loyal dogs. A colleague once mentioned to me,"The thing about dogs is that they know who their owner is, and a cat, knows where their home is."

You can never totally own them, but you just got to learn to trust , let go and still love.

You have been gone for a day now. I miss you. Trust that fate is in order for your return.

Life In the New Year...

2007-01-01T20:28:00.000+08:00

Its been awhile since I blogged about anything. Was intending to create a last post for 2006, but I was too busy lazing around while on leave. It was a good buildup to the next work year with 13 days away from office. This is the first time I went on such long leave and oh, did it feel so good. What more with the festive season in the air.

Seen quite a few shows lately as follow:

Death note 1 & 2
James Bond: Casino Royale
Saw III
Deja Vu
Eragon
The Holiday
Curse of the Golden Flower

And I notice. With the exception of "The Holiday", every single show out there involves killing. The highest stake in every movie, is life. Probably a depiction of what is really going on with us huh? You lose your life, you lose everything. This is the exact reason why using life as a stake in movie plots, is an almost sure way to keep the audience captivated.

Isn't it ironic that for movie goers like us, despite our craving to see survival being fought over, life outside the movie theatre proceeds mundanely without any life-threatening adventures to go by?

Or course, we wouldn't want to be caught in gun fights for anything in the world. Its just food for thoughts, that deep inside, we value life and while we are not maiming each other on the streets, it would still be worth a minute of your time to reflect on your life so far and how it should be moving for the year of 2007.

I hereby wish you a Merry X'mas and Happy New Year.

When Forgetting Is Not Enough...

2006-12-14T23:19:00.000+08:00

Its been awhile since I 'really' blogged.

Some people were commenting on it, saying "You hardly blog nowadays." Rather than having nothing to blog about, the truth is, ironically, I have too much to. Work has been piling up, coming to the end of the year... which is good, cause it keeps my mind off the burgeoning issues that I have up there. But whenever I am on the roads, which is quite often in my line of work, I'll start 'blogging' in my head. So much that, at night, when I nestle down in front of my PC, I do not feel like repeating myself once more, when I really should be resting for the next working day.

Anyway, what has seemed more prominent to me for the past 1 month, has to be this thingy named "Selective memory". Heard over the airwaves that the mind has a way of selecting what it wants to remember and that, it is easier to forget about unhappy memories as compared to happy ones. Its not what you can choose, but what will happen up there subconsciously.

I remember hearing about this fact at the same time, when not too long ago, an Ex texted me. This one happens to be in the 'Selective List' of 'To forget', which I of course, being the sentiment dude, refuse to 'Empty from Recycle Bin'.

I was actually out on a bling when the first text came, by then, I wasn't exactly sober. Emotions gate opened a little as a little of the past was unearthed and tossed around. All in all, nothing outstanding in particular, you know about these Ex stuffs.

When I woke up in the morning, I read through the SMS conversation and admittedly, I cringed at how emo-wimpy I was. In the midst, I also reminded myself not to reply to such message while drunk in future.

Then came 1 part which hit me hard.

It was something that goes "don't deny that I was embaressed about our relationship...."

I froze.

There was pain. Sorrow and disappointment.

Which didn't last long. I felt insulted.

What embarressment?

If you ask around, I'm quite top on Bachelor Lists around the place, ok?

I'm not 1 who is keen for burning bridges. But in my current sober state, I can see everything clearly as compared to when I was 'drunk'. When I start to piece all the "Forgetten Facts" together, I had to conclude that the things that this Ex had said and done, had stained my opinion of her, not just as a friend, but as a person.

I only hope that this Ex will never ever text or call me, ever again.

Periodic Felines EPL Challenge, Round 4, 3rd Leg...

2006-12-04T22:10:00.000+08:00

Starting Scoreline: FF 5.5, TP 3.5

1) Everton 0:1/2 West Ham Win
2) Manchester City 0:1 Watford Win

3) Charlton 0:0 Blackburn Win
4) Tottenham 0:1 Middlesbrough Draw

Tentative Scoreline: FF 5.5, TP 6.5

5) West Ham 0:1/2 Wigan
6) Newcastle 0:1/4 Reading

Periodic Felines EPL Challenge, Round 4, 2nd Leg...

2006-12-02T15:41:00.000+08:00

Starting Scoreline: FF 2.0, TP 1.5

1) Arsenal 0:3/4 Tottenham Lose
2) Portsmouth 0:1/4 Aston Villa Lose 1/2
3) Wigan ~~1/4~~1/2:0 Liverpool Win
4) Blackburn 0:1/2 Fulham Lose
5) Reading 0:0 Bolton Lose
6) Sheffield United 0:1/4 Charlton Win
7) Middlesbrough 1:0 Manchester United Draw

(Handicap adjusted)

Finishing Scoreline: FF 5.5, TP 3.5

Periodic Felines EPL Challenge, Round 3, 6th Leg...

2006-11-29T23:41:00.000+08:00

Starting Scoreline: FF 4.0, TP 9

1) Fulham 1:0 Arsenal Win
2) Aston Villa 0:1/2 Manchester City Win
3) Bolton 3/4:0 Chelsea Win half
4) Liverpool 0:1.25 Portsmouth ~~Win~~Lose
5) Manchester United 0:1.5 Everton Lose

Finishing Scoreline: FF 4.0, FP 10
Currently on TP's iPod Playlist: "Daddy Cool" by Boney M

*Smug*

Scoreline to bring over for Round 4: FF 2.0, TP 1.5

Periodic Felines EPL Challenge, Round 3, 5th Leg...

2006-11-28T23:43:00.000+08:00

Guess what? Weekday EPL to fill in the suicidal mid-weeks. What a relieve.

Starting Scoreline: FF 3.0, TP 9

1) Watford 0:1/4 Sheffield United Lose

Finishing Scoreline: FF 4.0, TP 9

Periodic Felines EPL Challenge, Round 3, 4th Leg...

2006-11-26T19:36:00.000+08:00

Starting Scoreline: FF 2.0, TP 8

1) Newcastle 0:1/4 Portsmouth Lose
2) Tottenham 0:1/2 Wigan Win
3) Manchester United 0:0 Chelsea Draw

Finishing Scoreline: FF 3.0, TP 9

Periodic Felines EPL Challenge, Round 3, 3rd Leg...

2006-11-25T17:09:00.000+08:00

Starting Scoreline: FF 0.5, TP 5.5

1) Charlton 0:0 Everton Draw
2) Aston Villa 0:1/2 Middlebrough Lose
3) Fulham 0:0.25 Reading Win
4) Liverpool 0:1.25 Manchester City Win half
5) West Ham 0:0.75 Sheffield United Lose half
6) Bolton 1/2:0 Arsenal Win

Finishing Scoreline: FF 2.0, TP 8

In the Light of the Sun...

2006-11-19T23:12:00.000+08:00

That night I was drunk. I just wanted to run, to get away, to somewhere unfamiliar. It wasn't a trip that I needed, just some place where I can think of nothing but what I want to think about.

I found myself lying by the seaside. Somehow things never seemed so calm before.

The screen was fading when I saw the first glimpse of sunlight, just then I heard the following line...

In the light of the sun, is there anyone? Oh it has begun...

And like bullets raining into me.

This world you must've crossed... you said...

You don't know me, you don't even care...

When flowers gaze at you... they're not the only ones who cry when they see you...

I think I need a sunrise, I'm tired of the sunset...

And I remembered. The tears were real.

Boston by Augustana.

G33k Talk...

2006-11-19T16:47:00.000+08:00

The end of the year is always a good time for economy. Every single activity seems to be overclocked. Down from your daily work schedule to your social activities and acquisition manuvoeurs. What more? Santa Claus is coming to town next month.

Expenditure has been soaring high and despite my attempts to keep it under more scrutiny, I could only break even my savings with desire for gadgets.

The new Apple Shuffle is a beauty. If no one had told me, I would have thought that Apple has designed a clothe peg as a gift item. Who could imagine that this weight-less innocent "peg" serves as a mp3 player and at a cost of around S$150? Now I can easily drown my pains during runs. There is very little barrier to entry. But still, I'm holding on to the rails.

The other item on the shopping list, is a new PC. Every few years, your current workstation turns cranky and slow. Gradually, you realise that you can afford to take toilet and snack breaks in between program start-ups. Your brother throws you a new game to try online and you witness nothing but lags and accusations from online gamers that you are a major screw-up to their team and nothing but jinx. You walk to Sim Lim and you get high looking at the price lists, hot chicks pushing Made-in-China mp3 players plus the realisation that you are a grown-up now. The Gaming Boy can now afford to upgrade his gears like a Lvl 25 Pudge, with Level 4 Equipment Recipes, just like in DOTA.

But what is up next is a series of obsession and headaches as I try to decide what brand and make of parts to assemble. The new Intel Core 2 series is not making it any better for me. Newly launched in July and available in market for a reasonable price. Was looking at a Intel P4 3.0GHz with 1 Gig RAM, and that would allow me to play any game out there right?

Not so easy with the new shite. It seems that for a hundred plus more with Intel Core2 E6300, I can have a devil which upon overclocking, can leave the Athlon 64 and Pentium P945(in their overclocked states) biting the dust.

The difference probably would not even be noticable given the light tasks I'll be performing. But hey, you can't hit 200 km/hrs on Singapore roads too. Why do people still buy Porsche?

But with all these purchases, you need money, you know?

Where am I suppose to get all those money? I wonder...

Round 3, 2nd Leg...

Starting Scoreline: FF 0.5, TP 5

1) Wigan 0:0.25 Aston Villa Win 1/2
2) Blackburn 0:0 Tottenham Draw

Finishing Scoreline: FF 0.5, TP 5.5

Round 2, 3rd Leg...

2006-11-18T22:59:00.000+08:00

Starting Scoreline: TP 2.5, FF 7

Each taking turns to pick, the following are as agreed upon between FF and me. Since FF need just 1 win to close Round 2. The moment she lands on the last base, the remaining result will roll over to Round 3.

1) Manchester City 0:1/2 Fulham Win
2) Reading 0:1/2 Charlton Lose

Final Scoreline: TP 3.5, FF 10
Conclusion: FF is the winner of our poor crustacean friends in Cereals.

Round 3, Start...

1) Arsenal 0:1.5 Newcastle Win
2) Chelsea 0:1.75 West Ham Win
3) Everton 0:1/4 Bolton Win
4) Portsmouth 0:3/4 Watford Win 1/2
5) Sheffield Utd 1.25:0 Manchester United Lose 1/2
6) Middlesbrough 1/2:0 Liverpool Win

Round 3, 1st Leg Scoreline: FF 0.5, TP 5
Verdict: Whoooose's your Daddy?!

How Many Times Can You Lose Your Virginity?...

2006-11-12T19:30:00.000+08:00

A friend told me that one of my Ex-es have revealed that she lost her virginity to this other guy whom she met after we broke-up.

The following were my thoughts:

1) Can she lose her virginity TWICE?
2) Is he some big-shot celebrity such that it sounds so much better to lose her virginity to him than to me?
3) Dammit. Was she even a virgin when I did her?
4) Maybe, she actually knew him before me and I thought otherwise?

Now gals will say,"Grow up, whats with this virginity-taking thing?". Boys will always be Boys, Peter Pan doesn't grow up, remember? Issue of ego in this case(Refer to Pt 2) may not be logically-linked, but hell yeah, its applicable!

I feel like calling her up and to clarify situations but from what it seems, she's quite confrontational-phobic. What if she turns around and claims that I raped her, hence not consider loss of virginity, then what am I gonna say wor?

Lies-weaving bitch.

Anyway, it doesn't stop Earth from rotating and the ball from rolling. Back to EPL Round 2, 2nd Leg.

Starting Scoreline: TP 2.5, FF 7

Each taking turns to pick, the following are as agreed upon between FF and me.

1) Reading 1/4:0 Tottenham Lose
2) Arsenal 0:1/2 Liverpool Lose

Finishing Scoreline: TP 2.5, FF 9

EPL Round 2, 2nd Leg...

2006-11-11T20:04:00.000+08:00

Starting Scoreline: TP 1, FF 2

Each taking turns to pick, the following are as agreed upon between FF and me.

1) Manchester City 0:1/4 Newcastle Lose 1/2
2) Chelsea 0:2 Watford Lose
3) Everton 0:3/4 Aston Villa Lose
4) Middlesbrough 0:1/4 West Ham Win
5) Portsmouth 0:1/2 Fulham Lose
6) Sheffield Utd 1/4:0 Bolton Lose 1/2
7) Wigan Athletic 0:1/2 Charlton Lose
8) Blackburn 3/4:0 Manchester Utd Win 1/2

Finishing Scoreline: TP 2.5, FF 7

Verdict: Cereal Crayfish is seriously on the line.

EPL Round 2, 1st Leg...

2006-11-05T16:11:00.000+08:00

Last night, I look a 5 minutes glimpse at how Newcastle handled Sheffield United during the first half and I went to sleep knowing that my free beer should be pretty secured. Newcastle *sniggers*

This time round, a Cereal Crayfish meal is on the table. First to race to 10, will savour the ~~poor man's~~budget lobster for FREE!

1) West Ham 1:0 Arsenal WIN
2) Aston Villa 0:1/2 Blackburn LOSE
3) Tottenham 3/4:0 Chelsea LOSE

Teams in bold are the winning picks. Of coz, FF would beg to differ.

Current score. TP:1, FF:2

Emotionally Unavailable (Physically Available?)...

2006-11-04T03:39:00.000+08:00

A night at Velvet, and it seemed like a perfect night out. What with everyone getting drunk and semi-drunk when you are only nicely high. I don't believe in getting drunk in club, because I do not derive any pleasure out of it. Down on the ground, out of control, making a scene and hangovers, just so not my shot of tequila.

I'm a poor drinker. These are what I had in progressive order:

01 glass x Vodka Supernova (An in-house concoction at Zouk I was told)
01 glass x Bourbon Coke
04 shots x Sex on the Beach
02 x bottle of Heineiken

And that was all. Enough for me to maintain composure while making eyes at the ladies and strutting my stuffs on the dance floor and taking care of any casualties.

Its been quite a week. Work and all, meet-up with old friends and stuffs. And the realisation of what I had been burdened with for the past couple of months, which I had blissfully been unconscious of.

Today, for the 2nd time in 3 months, I had to end another courtship. Abeit this time, I was able to give the other party a less vague and more fair answer.

"Sorry. I'm emotionally unavailable." (Yes, that sounds exactly like a player's line)

"So, that means you are physically available la?"

What can I say to that? Guys are ALWAYS physically available, but what separates Man from animals, is that we do screen our meat.

Facts aside, I realise that I am quite a perfectionist where relationship is concerned. Anything less than perfect is simply not enough for me. I do not need the sexiest, most charismatic or intelligent partner. All I'm looking for, is that someone who is JUST right. Which, seems like a tall task, given the track records.

Looks are important, never denied that. My prowl tonight, had spotted so many attractive ladies that I would love to be involved with. Yet, thinking at my current accessible contacts, I don't seem to know many of. Which, statistically speaking, is impossible, given the circles I have access to. Is it because I'm always never satisfied, my fate is as so or I'm a loner by heart?

Well, as a comfort, as least my "daughter" is sleeping soundly by the laptop now. She's had a tough day, but I share go into that another day.

Good night Blog.

Adios.

Regrets in The Myth...

2006-10-12T00:35:00.000+08:00

The great thing about those online movie streaming programmes, is that you can not worry about boredom whenever you get home too early. Side-effect though, is that you get a tad over-dosage of movies.

Last night, I watched this movie "The Myth" for the second time. I had seen this show sometime ago and I'm not sure if I had blogged about it, for I'm experiencing some deja vu right now as I'm typing. This is a show that had received mediocre reviews. But for me, this is one of those haunting ones that stick on in your head even weeks after you have seen it.

After some analysis, I may have the reason. This show has got lots of lingering regrets. What regrets?

How the loyal, valiant general was ultimately killed by the traitors. How he would place his call of duty over the princess. How Jacky Chan wouldn't claim/grasp that he was the general reincarnate? How the princess would choose to stay on for the dead general. It doesn't help that the princess is so pretty.

I don't think regret is the right word to use. But it just seems appropriate.

Regrets. Things do not seem to end where they should be.

Regrets.

I think these guys may also feel the same way for the show.

Age...

2006-10-09T00:51:00.000+08:00

You would think that at the age of 28, someone like me seems to be having hellurva time. Earning for the upkeep of just one, no major commitments, in good health, no lack of social activities. PLUS, it can only get better, afterall, they say men age like wine, older the better. And at my age, I'm at best, a young wine(hope I come from a good year though).

And you know what? I agree, to a major extent. Much more dough would be colorful, but thats another story. Of course, with dough, I can write a book on the numerous lifestyle changes I'll adopt, but as with all other things, life will always be more perfect if you can have it your way. Its neverending and there is a line between pursuing a dream or fantasy. Pardon this sidetrack.

Problem is, time doesn't stay still. I can still vividly recall the day I got enlisted into the army, which is a good decade ago. Likewise, a decade from now, I will be looking back.

Already, I can feel the effects of age. I am unable to stay as alert and energetic on 2 hours sleep and recovery from intense exercise aien't instantaneous anymore. How would things be like when I'm 35? This has driven me towards more enthusiast and commitment to a regular fitness regime. Its not a matter of passing the annual IPPT, or surpassing your bunk-mates with the most rippling biceps anymore. Its a challenge, between me and Age.

You can never beat Age, but theres no harm in putting up a good fight while you are at it, doesn't it?

A Lush Night...

2006-09-25T22:11:00.000+08:00

Amazing how fast one can have a change of heart. I'm so fickle, I hate myself sometimes. Apparently, over the weekend, I... have converted to Lush 99.5FM as my Official Radio Station of Preference.

Its so addictive and soothing that I have not been able to tamper the frequency on da tuner.

Sensual. Groovy. Jazzy. I'm so in love.

For certain reasons, this station reminds me of the chill-out lounge, Balcony, beside Heeren. And in the forever-inspiring setting sun, I concocted this iterniery for a weekend evening.

2100 hrs - Participants to have showered and perfumed. Assemble at "Place of Choice" for a nice dinner and wine.
2359 hrs - Mid-night movie of Choice, preferably at Orchard Cineleisure.
0230 hrs - Adjourn to chill-out session at Balcony (Open 24hrs/7days)
0530 hrs - To catch sun-rise at Changi/ECP.

Now, for kakis to do that with...

I also watch Singapore Idol too, U noe?... =p

2006-09-06T22:03:00.001+08:00

Today, I ta bao some Ee Mee for dinner and while at it, I "accidentally" turned on the TV and voila!, Singapore Idol was just about to start. Since I had not seen a single episode of this singing competition franchise, I decided to stay seated and see what everything is all about. The hype created by the show and excellent publicity ensured that I recognise at least 2 contestants, Paul Twohill and Jonathan Leong.

Now, the good thing about coming into the show at this late stage, is that you don't have to cringe on your sofa. All four finalists were entertaining, but I think Dick Lee will win. Just joking. I think Jonathan will nap it. He seems so cool, great singing and he just can't seem to do anything wrong in the judging panel's eyes(ears). But if I were to place a wager, I wouldn't put any Greenback's on him. The odds(payout) will be too low. And if the First Rule of soccer punting is anything to go by, in order to win moo-lah, you should bet to lose. I'll probably put my "Yusok Bin Ishak"s on Paul Twohill. I wonder if Ladbrokes accept such bets.

I like the first song that Jonathan sang. This is the one.

Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol
We'll do it all
Everything
On our own

We don't need
Anything
Or anyone

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel

Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads

I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things will never change for us at all

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

So beautiful right? I love the chorus.

Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Only for FLW...

2006-09-02T03:52:00.000+08:00

I know that I haven't been blogging consistently when moments ago, I panicked when I forgot the User ID that I use for logging into my blog.

I'm never one for those 3D navigational/shooting game. After all these year and the hypes, I was never the slightest tempted to download the demo until I just saw this in Boing Boing.

Frank Lloyd Wright, Father of Modern Architectural. He lives!

If You're Gone...

2006-08-27T03:05:00.000+08:00

This is going to be one post that may(or not) make sense to me. Hence, it's definitely not going to make any sense to anyone else. If you choose to read on and get confused, just let it past.

I recall there's a part in Friends where Rachel ranted about how everyone has baggages. Who doesn't have baggages? Just moments ago, I realise how big a baggage I had been lugging along for the longest time. A light sack, which over time, took its toll on my shoulders. My shoulders have however, grew numb from it all.

Its amazing how you can do everything right and yet all goes down the drain in split seconds, over events which you, yourself can never comprehend. Sometimes you want to put things right, yet other times, you prefer to aggrevate matters.

Why so?

The need for control. First, you try to correct matters by compensating, failing which, you take the next course and try to sink the boat. Simply because, should it sink, at least YOU are the one driving it down. YOU are the one who CHOSE to sink it.

For the longest time, I have been trying to sink the boat. Looking back, there were some regrets. I may have hurt feelings along the way, but hopefully they were merely mild stings.

One goal in mind. A lot of things I have done for it. And the people I have gotten acquainted with, just to achieve it. Just when I thought I had enough and gave up, I stumbled upon something that hinted to me, just how possibly close I was.

Feelings tell me that I still want to sink this boat, but I am weary. I have to move on. And this time, its easy for me to make up my mind when I realise, there is only one clown in this comedy.

Cry for this clown some time, will ya?

If you're gone - maybe it's time to go home
There's an awful lot of breathing room
But I can hardly move
If you're gone - baby you need to come home
Cuz there's a little bit of something me
In everything in you
~ If You're Gone, Matchbox 20

There can be only one Mistress in da house...

2006-08-20T18:09:00.000+08:00

RRooooaaarrrrrr!!!

Horizonal salsa...

Lets do some pole dancing.

Another seductive pose of hers.

Resting right on top of my trap bag.

Beautiful Sunday...

2006-08-06T11:36:00.000+08:00

I always like Sunday mornings. For one thing, it presents alot of options with no "obligation" pick something happening, unlike Saturdays. After all, the next day is going to be another Blue Monday and all partying should have ceased by 0300hrs on a Sunday.

What would I usually/like to do on a Sunday? Join some guys for a round of street soccer back at my alma mater. Perhaps, draw a few closer friends to dim sum at the Tung Lung outlet @ Far East Square, my favourite dim sum hang out, followed by explorations of the area. Town just feels so different in the weekend. Or if I'm late, I might plan a fancy lunch in town before early noon movie.

But this Sunday morning, I decided to go simple and ta bao some wanton mee, zhu chang fen(rice rolls) and the Sunday Times. And nothing made my day so much as seeing Debbie Wong on the back page of Sunday Times. And she likes cats. Somehow I have an instinctive liking for ladies who love felines. In fact, the gal I just ousted out from my life was partly due to her indifference to my Baby despite all former pleas of "Oh, so cute!" and "I wanna meet your daughter!". I do not like anyone who doesn't love my daughter. Anyway, pardon my side-tracking.

Oh Debbie, oh!

La viva bonita.

Update:
Talk about Cats, all of a sudden, I recall a dream I had this morning. I dreamt that I was in living in a house near my previous place. I was wandering the area and I kept seeing dogs and in particular, I noticed a Schnauser. Then I went back home and in a small cradle was a baby Schnauser. My brother then claimed that he had found it abandoned outside and that its a Mini Schnauser. At that point, I questioned him as to why he was so sure that its a Mini Schnauser and not a Schnauser? He answered,"Well, the shape, can tell wat!" Anyway, I was very happy with the Baby Mini Schnauser.

Whatever does this dream mean?

In The Near Future...

2006-08-05T22:32:00.000+08:00

Its irking when you realise that while life does deal you a complete deck of 52 cards, they all seem to arrive at the wrong times.

A year ago, I was expecting the full commitment of a relationship when the girl I was dating bailed out on me. A year later, I straightened my thoughts and wanted a leisure pace of fun without any obligation and I get "emotionally blackmailed" to take on a baggage.

A showdown of "Do you see anything coming up in the near future?", "I have no lack of suiters ya noe?" was a big turn-off for me. Maybe I do not like her enough to give it all. Maybe I seriously do not like been taken hostage. I can only say "No". And being the very nice, hpocritical guy that I am, I had to throw in the traditional follow-up of "Its not you. I'm still recovering from a previous relationship.", that lame crap.

Anyway, its bye to free sex and it really looks like I gonna have to be touching myself in the near future.

Welcum To The Sleaze Club...

2006-07-29T11:23:00.000+08:00

For what had seemed like eternity, I had always picture myself as being decent in my conduct where interaction with opposite sex is concerned. I have always been taught to respect the Gals, perhaps abit too much. That's a reason why I'm have always been very disturbed by people with sleazy acts or "unhonorary" intentions.

What kind of sleazy acts? Hmmm, like moving up to a lady in a club and after 2 verse of "Hello" and "Whats your name", you start to check out her curves with your paws, failing which, upon rejection, you move on to the next target. Always kept me in awe as to how they have the guts to carry it off and get away with it all the time, occassionally hitting on a very willing recipient.

Other "Unhonorary" intentions? Things like an acquaintances, even after knowing whoever is your romantic interest, and still tries to date them out.

For a brief period in time, I was questioning if there were any general standards of conduct. Very brief it was indeed. Then I realise the beauty of my observation.

What da heck! If you can't beat them, you jolly well join them. And from what I see, the green is very green on the other side.

Hitting on your girlfriend's best friend, acquantance's romantic interest. Laying paws on drunken chicks, who, in reality speaking, do not want to be "too respect". You don't have to be a bastard, but acting like one, most probably will give you what you want. Of course, looks and style do play a part. So if all else fails on your part, you know what to blame. You're just the loser.

Meet My Daughter...

2006-07-27T20:42:00.000+08:00

Like Littlemissdrinkalot who recently had her hands full with a new member of her family, I have mine to take care of. Few months ago had seen me obssessed enough to take in a Norwegian Forest Cat, Red Tabby with White who was around 4 months old. Never regretted it though, as I'm witnessing her, turning from a timid kitty into a jumpy, manja princess.

For starters, I'm currently not staying with my mummy. I guess coming home every evening to an empty house kind of gave me the glooms. Partly one of the reasons why I was contemplating a living, breathing, warm companion to bunk in. And she happened to fit my initial intentions to a T.

Everyday, I'll open the door to find her waiting for me(Probably waiting for food). In the morning, she'll perform the Alarm clock duties faithfully at 730am and won't stop crying until I open the door(Probably telling me to get lost and go to work). When I'm about doing my own stuffs, she'll be around me. This was almost exactly what the "Manual" had said. During the hot months do not expect a lap cat; they are much happier laying at your side than on your lap. And lay around she does, exceptions of her occassional "bark" at me for not paying enough direct attention to her. Racing me up and down the stairs. And her vocals are truly amazing. While I used to think that cats can only "purr" and "meow", now I'm trying to learn her language.

Most times, I just can't help it as I nose her and ask,"Do you luurrvveee DaD-dy?!?"

Somewhere Over The Rainbow/What A Wonderful World...

2006-06-30T00:56:00.000+08:00

Remember this. I have found the song. Still a wonderful number which I was describing to a friend,"So wholesome, so gay that it makes Superman want to take off his red underwear and run into the meadow and frolick with the daisy."

Ok, I added the Superman part after some editing during this post but I was labelled as "wussy" wor! Who "wussy"? Superman or me? Or is it the red underwear =p

The song that captivated me or rather the unique voice that did so, belonged to Aselin Debison who was doing a cover of the medley "Somewhere Over the Rainbow/What a wonderful world", originally performed by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole.

This song, ahhh.... makes me want to tumble down hilly slopes in my birtday suit, hug and kiss babies, wear polka-dotted pants and sashay down Orchard Road....

Hot(not so) on the Play-List...

2006-06-27T21:45:00.000+08:00

Remember the England World Cup song that is on the airwave now.

There. In all its glory. Interesting clip though. The singer reminds me of the has-been old star in that movie "Love Actually". Or is it really him?

Just now, I heard this song "So Sick" by Ne-Yo and for the first time, I noticed part of the lyrics that go

That's the reason I'm so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I'm so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why can't I turn off the radio?

And I was thinking to myself,"Thats strange, aien't it the other way round?".

I was heart-broken once, so I had this self-compiled collection of songs that I repeated on my playlist. I did not go to the radio because not every song on the air wave is sad "enough". A friend, Debbie, even had to lecture me to stop playing that CD, just so I can recover.

Taking her advise, I switched to less lyrical numbers(House) and true enough, within one, two week of no-lyrics therapy, my heart does hurt less.

Hmmm, so whats the point I'm trying to make here? Erm, no point. Just, you know?... love songs, lyrics and feelings.

Wonderful Song...

2006-06-25T02:48:00.000+08:00

Just now, around 2am, I was driving home after catching the Germany vs Sweden match and on Class95, I heard this particular song, seemingly sung by a voice that is sweet and slightly high. I can't differentiate if its by a young boy or a lady. Anyway, this melody was light, addictive and highly enchanting.

I tried to pick up the lyrics, but its wasn't too clear. But one thing is for sure, somewhere towards the middle of the song, the singer broke into the song "What a wonderful World" and then back to her number again. I believe it might be a variant of the song "What a Wonderful World" but then again, aien't sure.

Can anyone, please, please, please throw me a lead to this song. I need to know the singer and title.

Let it go, let it be...

2006-06-22T23:01:00.000+08:00

When I was in Vancouver, one of the things that made me uncomfortable was the fact that the Hong Konger migrants, seem to love talking about the Great Hong Kong everyday, at every single possible conversation. Ok, I exaggerated. It was simply that, they keep reminiscing their past in Hong Kong when it is a fact that they have left everything behind. Then they will start to compare Vancouver to Hong Kong, and start to complain.

Lately, I been meeting a lot of Singaporeans who had previously studied in Australia. And I see a similar trend in them. They cannot quite put their happy times in Downunder behind them. Some have made their way back to Australia. Good for them to be able to pursue what they themselves want. The others who are still lamenting, I only sense the psychological prison which they are subjecting themselves to. I can only feel sorry for them.

One thing about people. Our emotions do not allow us to put things behind at will. Same for memories, even more applicable to relationships. Trying to let go may take time, but ultimately, its important to do so. There is really no use leaving your heart in a previous position when you are physically miles away.

By the way, before I log off. Have you heard the crap song on radio that goes "England, win the world cup." PTOoi! When I see England play, I see eleven star players on the field and not a team. And furthermore, its taboo to sing about winning when you have not won it yet. I don't think England will make it to the semi's at the rate they are performing.

Current Affairs...

2006-06-11T15:22:00.000+08:00

It seems like the headlines have been talking about this young doctor who was caught in possession of some party drugs and a gay none the less. Nothing too bizaare a case except he happens to be a doctor. I understand that Professional Boards have strict standards on "character". Medical practitioner is a very respectable profession and being caught in possession of party drugs(Ice), is a definitely K.O for his career. Takes no experienced Board member to pass that verdict. But the fact that he's gay? What has it got to do with his profession? I sense the derogation as I zipped through the lines containing the words "threesome" and "gay" and there were many.

Given Singapore's firm stand against drugs, the severity of this misdeed is understandable. What I felt uncomfortable was seeing his face plastered all over the papers. Those were pretty big and clear pictures mind you, more lucid than any Tammy has ever taken. Given what he has to go through next, I think he has enough dues to pay off but those published pics are going to be the finishing touch that goes beyond the death of his medical profession.

What can we say? The press enjoys spreading it and so does the public slurps on it.

And all the talks about lift upgrading and political party supporters. Isn't it about high time that the leading party wakes up to the idea that political threats like this, is not the way to go for a generation that is better educated? The rising Gen is more egoistic and rebellious. And frankly speaking, from what I had gathered on the ground, I would estimate that 7 of 10 of my peers would vote not for the opposition, but against the leading party. They are simply losing supporters, not a case of the opposition winning them.

I'm not that old, we're not that old. We have lots of time to watch the show. Plus, we already know that its playing.

Rube Goldberg...

2006-06-04T11:20:00.000+08:00

Embedding was disabled by request by these Rube Goldberg-like machines are definitely a joy to watch.

Love & The City...

2006-06-01T21:37:00.000+08:00

This is a cold, hard concrete jungle. I aien't telling you anything that you don't already know. I'm sure all of us would lament about the hectic pace of life draining off our energy and any pleasurable lifestyle that we could possibly smell. Then we blame this city for the lack of activities it has to offer.

But for goodness sake, if you can't find vibrancy in a city, do you expect to see it in the country-side?

Wake-boarding
Dancing lessons
Yoga
Ice-skating
Shopping
Library
Movie
Dining
Hiking(There are natural reserves around)
Ball sports
Places of interest(Think Sentosa, Zoo)
Picnic in the park(Botanical Gardens)
Gathering friends for BBQ and Pot-luck

The list is only as exhaustive as your imagination(Pardon the poor of mine). Let that(no activities) not be an excuse. What is probably causing all these weariness, is loneliness.

While some people are blessed in finding love and companionship, there are also those who have yearn for the elusive love and have to go through heartache by the dozens. Fate so happens to strike with no regards for charm, wealth or intelligence.

Don't be ashame to admit that you need love when it is lacking in your life, for the very need for love is what being alive is all about. Find peace in your santuary by allowing your fingers to loosen around the fistful of sand that we named fate, and not hold on to events that you have no control over.

Change of hearts, rejection from former lovers, unfaithfulness. Don't take it personally and accept those potholes of the course as part of the journey to our destination. Love yourself as those who don't, do not deserved to be.

Your friend here has not deserted you and we wait side by side. In the meantime, we stay alive under the scotching sun of Singapore, until the warmth that we long for, finds us.

Violent...

2006-05-30T22:59:00.000+08:00

Just to prove a point against the myth.

The World...

2006-05-30T00:11:00.000+08:00

Wallace's arched spine laid snudgely on his armchair with straightened legs, right over left, left heel serving as a pivot on the squarish box of a sub-woofer underneath his desk. The rectangular Ikea wooden desk's design could not be any closer to simple. Only two speakers and a couple of books, served to mask, to a minimal extent, the emptiness of the deck. His elbows stayed glued to the arm-rests as his nimble wrists and fingers orchastrated the scripts.

This is a world that has been exclusively his solace from the mundanes of routine. A world whose beauty held no bounds and yet took no more than the simplest of imagination to conjure. His fingers dancing on the keyboard, the pitches and tones hypnotised his consciousness every now and then. Consciousness... Is that the name for the prison cell which chains us to a land called Reality?

When hes weary, the wrists stayed, eyes closed and chins lifted, he paused momentarily, just to bask in the aural of that world. A world that is his and yours to share.

Hi. Have you been there?

Dogs and Cats...

2006-05-24T19:00:00.000+08:00

There are things that I don't get and this is one of them. Each time I talk about cats, some people will look at me and tell me,"I'm a dog lover." and vice versa. For some of them(note, only some), by their short reply, the following meaning is put across:

Dog Lover... "I hate cats."

Cat Lover... "I hate dogs."

What is this thing about the species' rivalry? Are dogs and cats really natural rivals logger-heads? Depending on the breed(and upbringing), I have seen dogs and cats being cool with each other. In that case, instinctive rivalry shouldn't be the case here.

Which brings me to my other reasoning. Perhaps, when people placed their preference for one specie over the other, they are making a statement in the kind of temperament that they like. Dogs are perceived as being more down-to-earth and loyal while cats are much more unpredictable, "un-controllable" and nomandic.

Or at least, I used to have that perception. But lately, I have been doing a lot of research and I found that, cats can be equally as loving as a dog, maybe in their own ways.

Last night, I had the honour of visiting a home which houses an Alaskan Malamute, one Siberian Husky, one British Bull-dog, 4 Norwegian Forest Cats. And yah, they are all cool. Just 7 kids messing around with each other.

Me? I'm cool with both. There was one really unfortunate incident in my life with a puppy, but whats over is over. I look forward to loving, not backwards at hating and bearing grudges.

Now, am I right? Or am I not wrong?

Meat & Special...

2006-05-14T23:06:00.000+08:00

I just feel like blogging, although I have nothing special to blog about.

For the longest time, I remember liking meat so much that I cannot do any meal without any meat. But after awhile, I realise meat just taste the same all the time. Mutton tastes like mutton, beef's essense is in its texture, chicken is just plain.

Then one fine day, I decided, this is enough. I needed variety and I wanted variety. So I ventured into uncovered grounds such as egg plants. People see me ordering egg plants and they think I love it. The truth is, I'm actually quite put off by it. But I still force myself to eat it because I don't believe in routines.

How can anyone consume 30 years of meat and are still swearing by it? Can I safely conclude that pure meat-eaters are boring people?

On another note, I like this girl. I thought I was happy seeing her. Then I realised that I'm actually "happier" when she was not around. I only realised it when shes back.

I confided in a friend and I was pinned onto the wall when he said,"Thats because you don't feel special."

Yah, I'm always never special. *Sign*

I Walk Alone...

2006-05-14T03:25:00.000+08:00

Boxing Joe should be talking about this.

Just came back from watching a game of FA Cup Final between Liverpool and Westham.

Exciting game, although I only started from the 75th minute. Anyone noticed that Liverpool's 3rd goal(equaliser) by Steven Gerald is uncannily similar to the one he scored against Olympiako in the last Champions League.

Yes, the goal that made me cried like a baby. Only this time, I was jumping on the bar top of Ice Cold Beer. A replay of the game showed that Gerald also scored an earlier goal in similar style before that. All are back passes(irrespectively of which side's player) from which Stevie would appear(from outside of the TV screen) and connect it with a POWER DRIVER, straight to the corner of heaven!

*ORGASM* *HIGH* *EUPHORIC* *I can sense the lady on my left, wetting her panties*

Stevie is my epitome of "Volley King From > 25 yards".

Stevie is my idol and I can see why Liverpool loves him. Gerald IS Liverpool.

And no, I'm still not a Liverpool fan. I walk alone.

Quotes of the night.

"West Ham *Clap Clap*... SheringHam *Clap Clap*... West Ham *Clap Clap*... SheringHam*Clap Clap*..."

"Liverpool is F***-up, can only win Cups from penalties and cramps!"

"Cisse's favourite move is to feed the ball towards the corner flag, with or without support on the wing."

Florr Mattress Needed, Urgent...

2006-05-13T19:08:00.000+08:00

I have decided against a bed frame as I did not want the rigidity, of my room's layout, that comes with it.

I am very keen on just a mattress on the floor. But up til now, I have only been able to locate 2 shops(excluding Ikea), one Tatami Shop in Esplanade and the other one, System Mind Platforms in Millenia Walk.

Before I end up sleeping on the floor, I need to get that mattress first.

Does anyone know where can I find a Futon mattress or Tatami bed?

Possession Part X...

2006-05-11T00:53:00.000+08:00

Doesn't it hurt to know that her tears aien't for you, but for someone else?

And if love(used loosely in this context) isn't about possession? Why should you be feeling this way?

You know that her bitterness is about losing possession, hence it shouldn't be love.

Yet, you want to possess her. Is that love?

Signing off,
Itchy Sado

Another Cruise Towards The Ice-berg...

2006-05-07T02:13:00.000+08:00

Those eyes captivated me. So lost, full of sorrows and resignation.

"So do you want to stay seated or make a move?"

She looked up, startled. Yet as fast, she regained her composure with her bright, sparkling eyes and radiant smile,"Let's go."

Did I like the fact that I "think" that I know whats on her mind? Or that she was trying to conceal whatever issues that she was facing?

And that night, in the car, she let it all go. Did I tell you I have a weakness for tears?

I'm so going to be fucked up again.

An African Fable Of The Cat...

2006-05-01T22:16:00.000+08:00

I came across the following story in Moggies and its cited source is from the Rhodesian Native Affairs Department, 1948. And how true it is.

Once upon a time the cat did not live in the houses of men. She lived only in the bush or in the jungle.

One cat became friendly with a rabbit. She went everywhere with the rabbit and was astonished at the craftiness of her friend. One day a duiker (duiker or duyker: small african antelope), fought with the rabbit and killed it with its horns. As her friend was dead the cat lived with the duiker. Then the duiker was killed by a leopard, so the cat decided to live with the leopard. A few days later they met with a lion. The lion fought the leopard and killed it. The poor cat then made friends with the lion and lived with him until one day they met a herd of elephant. A huge bull fought with the lion and killed it.

The cat thought to herself, "I must make friends with an animal as large and strong as this elephant - surely nothing can defeat it!"

But her troubles were not yet over, for one day a hunter shot the elephant with a poisoned arrow and the elephant died.

Now the cat did not know what to do, for she had never seen a two-legged animal such as this. She thought hard and said to herself, "if this man can kill a huge animal like an elephant, I had better make friends with him so that I can live in safety."

She followed the hunter back to his home, and when the hunter entered his hut the cat crept up on to the verandah. She heard sounds of quarrelling in the hut and saw the man in flight from a woman who was beating him with a stick for stirring porridge.

The cat said to herself, "Now I have seen the strongest of all creatures - a woman!"

Ever after this the cat has lived in the huts with the women, because it is they who are all-powerful.

I wish I'm a Lambo but...

2006-04-27T20:48:00.000+08:00

I'm a Ferrari 360 Modena!

You've got it all. Power, passion, precision, and style. You're sensuous, exotic, and temperamental. Sure, you're expensive and high-maintenance, but you're worth it.

"Take the Which Sports Car Are You? quiz.

Zhng My Horse...

2006-04-25T19:56:00.000+08:00

This is a true conversation between two guys, which might even fit into mrbrown and Mr. Miyagi's "Zhng My Car" podcast easily.

A: True, having a car is definitely much easier to sian char bo. Even if you take cab all the way, its just not the same.
B: Its funny how time flies. Just a few years ago, we were in hostel, scrimping on every single cent for dinner and drinks, now we are playing around with cars. Within our budget now.
A: Yeah. Boys will be boys, no matter how old you are, you still need toys. The only difference is, how big the toys are. They just keep on getting bigger and more expensive.
B: I have this theory on why guys like cars so much.
A: Why?
B: Its all survival. Since prehistoric days, the most desirable caveman has always been the one who hunts down the most rabbits, thus able to provide more. In modern days, its the guy who brings home the most dough. Since a car nowadays, is to some extent, an indication of their wealth, the Lamborghini dude out there is bound to be laying a lot of chicks.
A: Talk about prehistorics, I think last time, when there were no cars, horses would have served the same purposes. In fact, I think horses were more essential then. No public transport. You want to bring char bo to ulu places to hanky panky at night. Without horses, you have to walk there and back maaan. Which sane char bo will go with you?
B: Yah lor. Instead of brands like Mercedes, BMW, Honda, Toyota, they probably have different breeds. Like mule and donkey for lower budget. Then for horses, they have local breed or Italian Stallions. Different horses, different sizes, different speed.
A: And when choosing horses, you have to take into consideration their "food consumption". Like 1 kilo of oats, can travel how many kilometres.
B: They even have different kinds of horses. Work horse, family horse and racing horse(Ferrari). And you can zhng them.
A: Yeah, like using "Recaro" saddles, "HKS" riding rope and "Brembo" horse shoes. Then you sent to trainer to "tune" your horse.
B: Then each household might even have more than one horse. Weekend, you want to sian char bo, you ask to take the "Family Horse" out instead of your pony.
A: Yeah. And they probably have to pay "Road Taxes" too. Bigger "cc", pay more. Then each horse has life span wan. Ten years, old horse liao, can put to sleep. If healthy, can extend, then come 20 years, bo pian must really put to sleep.
B: Why? 20 years confirm cannot walk liao meh?
A: No lah. 20 years horse, everyday kena ridden hard, dun die will also go crazy. Crazy horses are dangerous. The gahmen will not risk that.
B: Hahahahaha. Then when going drinking in Inns, you have to find "Parking Lots" for your horse. Maybe even have "Valet" leh.
A: Again same thing, when picking up chicks, you can go "Eh babe, I'm riding a 56' Italian White. I send you back later?"
B: Then those with no ride leh? "Eh babe, later I walk you back?"
A: Yah, times have changed, tools changed but the concept is the same.
B: Time to go back to work.

The end.

Cats Are Not Just Cats...

2006-04-20T23:52:00.000+08:00

After having heard of the beauty of the Norwegian Forest Cat, I decided that I would like a close-up look of the cat at some point in time. A random drop-in on a Pet Shop in Holland Village lead me to an outlet of Pet Station in Frankel Avenue, where I dragged Mr.Husky along.

His reaction to my visit was one of humour,"Huh? Look at cats? Cats are cats, whats there to look at?"

A show-up at the outlet awed us momentarily. Sure. Cats are cats but there were so many breeds in the outlet that I realised our impression of cats is really limited to the Singapura around us.

Of course I manage to lay my eyes on the NFC that I came for. It was truly the "Siberian Husky" of the Cats World. There were also so many big "Tigers" around. Some breeds that I remember seeing, American Shorthair, British Shorthair, Maine Coon, Javanese, Birman (The blue eyes, they "electrified" me) and Ragdoll.

Among which, we also noticed that Maine Coon(the foreign talent version) cost up to S$1.6k whereas the same breed(locally breed) is easily half the price. Different breeds I can understand, but for the same breed, at double the pricing just because you have to import, is just not so easily apprehenable at first thought. End of the day, aien't they suppose to exhibit similar traits and do similar "work"? Ok, maybe some traits(appearances and accent) might differ but in this case, they look and sound the same to me.

End of the day, a final quote from Mr. Husky,"Wah. Really leh! Cats are not just cats."

Aien't they like humans too? ;p

Road Consciousness & MOS with Tiesto...

2006-04-15T13:17:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, was driving west along PIE when I was pasting the Bukit Timah Shopping Centre, I caught a glimpse of a black Mazda 3 on the left road shoulder, crashed. No emergency light and no driver outside vehicle. Was so fast that I found myself way past the site and wondering what could have gone wrong. I was disturbed. He might have been waiting for a toll-truck? Or just hanging around for help from friends? But what if he had crashed badly and every driver just zooms by, assuming the best? At that moment, I realise if I did not do anything, I wouldn't be able to sleep well for the next few days at least. So I dialled 995. I wasn't sure how bad situation was but I was a good feeling to know that whatever I did in my capacity, might have been able to save a person's life, and thats good enough.

Somehow, Dj Tiesto did delivered last night but I don't think he did impress. It was a truly carnival feel at MOS in the build-up to his set. Highlight of the night was when Xue-shuang flew over from Hong Kong impromptu-ly and I presented her to an un-assuming Energizing Bunny. Her expressions and the shreaks. Priceless. A pity it was too dark for me to take a video. Fun wasn't it? Your best friend, supposely thousands of miles away, suddenly right in front of you, just moments before the hottest party in town.

I did a count, I met 4 new guys and 8 new girls last night. At the end of the night, I realise I only remember 3 guys and 1 gal's name. Forgot about remaining guy and jumbled up the 7 girls name. I also realise Singaporean girls look alike. It seemed to be me as if I was staring at the same face albeit different sizes all night long. Must be the similar ways that they apply make-up. Maybe if the gals stop putting make-up, I'll have a much easier task remembering all of them but I'll also end up having a frightful experience in clubs. Muah hahahahahaha!

Obsessions...

2006-04-13T00:07:00.000+08:00

Having some spare time in the evening, I dropped by a car accessories mart in Bukit Timah to shop for car shampoo and some cleaning "tools".

I did not realise how much I love my car, until I was shampoo-ing myself just now and all that was I was thinking, was how shiok my car would be feeling when I'm shampoo-ing her.

This obsession is getting abit too far.

On the other hand, I'm not sure if I'm on heat or what. Bumped into my new neighbour today and she's quite the babe. Aien't exactly the hottest chick in town, but if there ever was a sweetest chick, she'll nail it hands-down. That cute frame in mini-skirt. The way she constantly wears a smile on her face. The way her dogs can't get enough of her and she seems to so enjoy cuddling them. I'm amused whenever the dogs stop bothering to bark just so they can turn around to greet her.

Looks like I'm not the only one obsessing around here.

Whatever it takes...

2006-04-11T23:04:00.000+08:00

Some time back, I had told myself that if Dj Tiesto ever comes to Singapore, I will attend his gig, no matter what price I have to pay. Looks like my faith is to be tested. Unable to secure a table nor advance tickets, I am left to fend for a spot in the queue on Friday. I can only pray that the heat will not be sweltering, the clouds will not pee and de-odourants don the surrounding bodies. God bless this fan.

Thats on Friday. Just this morning, I received news of an invitation to Zouk's 15th anniversary party, Crystal Ball. And right now, in my ~~wanking~~right hand, is the reverred golden ticket.

People who know me well will know that this is one poseur event that I will die to attend. Moment I set my eyes on my ticket, I spotted the "Bring One Guest" and my next thought was "I'm not going with a guy."

Which leaves me with 2 more options. Going alone or bring a girl.

I decided going alone, looks very loser-ish. So it has to be a girl I'm bringing.

Scouting through my list, I realise there are a lot of names I can ask. Some of them are undisputably gorgeous, presentable ladies that I know and yet, I can't bear to ask them. I do not know why, I am reserving my cards.

Until today, a call at 7pm hit me while I was snuggling up at home. It was a lady, a stranger. She was supposed to arrange for an appointment, but apparently, she screwed up. She asked if I could make it at last minute notice, I answered negatively. In the seconds following my hang-up, I couldn't concentrate on my PS2 set. The helpless-ness, the sense of anxiety of her, I couldn't rub off.

I looked at my mobile and dialled the last received call and I asked,"If I come down in 30 minutes time, will that do it for you?"

"Please do!"

35 minutes later, I was walking through the glass door, towards a giggling lady.

Then I realised what I had wanted for the date. I wanted a stranger. I think the key is "excitment". Because with romance, you should never be able to anticipate what you are going to get.

And thats on Saturday.

You betrayed, I fuck...

2006-04-10T18:27:00.000+08:00

This is again, one of those subjects which I had always want to post, but refrained from, because I'm afraid some people may get the wrong idea as to who I am referring to.

There are some codes of conduct that you do not do. First of all, if you fall out with a brother over a girl. Its forgivable. Some things are just hard to control, and feelings can't be controlled. But as long as competition is fair, with no back-stabbing, I think there should be no lamenting.

What I find unforgivable is, if you, in the process of trying to win a girl, not only do you try to back-stab your love rival, but at the same time, in attempting to do so, have to get a knife into other innocent parties, that shows a complete non-existent of loyalty. Do I want to be associated with you ever? I doubt it.

People like them can pretend it never happened. Well, the thing is. Not only do they know it happened, everyone else do.

Oh.

There is this one group of people, whom I dislike and who suddenly came to mind. And I suddenly realise why they are ONE group. Birds of a feather, do flock together. Really, dignified beings should not be sticking around and I wonder why some decent faces among them do.

What do I want to achieve from this posting? Don't know. Do I want people who even know me to take it seriously and guess whether I'm talking about them? Or would I want them to take it lightly, and be less sketical as to whom I'll be referring to?

Maybe, at the end of the day, it doesn't even matter at all. Who am I to judge people anyway? Will I betray people? Acquaintances, maybe. My bitches, unlikely. But one thing is for sure, I do not betray brothers just so that I can get some cheap shots from behind.

You can call me by my name. But next time, please, don't call me "brother". I'll fuck you, understand?

Aurora Borealis...

2006-03-28T21:41:00.000+08:00

Armed with my trusty Deuter, fueled by the few Snicker bars I have in my pocket, I left the cozy cabin. Martin had warned me against the mountain in the dark and company was necessary. But I knew solitude was the only option for me.

I made it up the designated footpath. This wasn't the most challenging of hikes although the frost really intimidated this unconditioned body. Each step I take, would deem another one necessary for the return trip, if there ever was going to be one.

For most people, this chest at the end of this rainbow is as insignifant and worthless as it is intangible. Yet, for this boy, it stands for the only one thing that he believes is real. Unparallel beauty.

Getting to the cliff is only an uneventful ride on the clock. He sat on a boulder, let his pack down and he eyed. If there was only one good thing that the frost can do right now, it would be freezing the clock.

Behold the shade of the Northern Lights.

The Things I Want To Blog About...

2006-03-27T22:34:00.000+08:00

I seem to be able to think of a thousand and one things that I would love to blog about in the daytime, but every night, as I stare into my screen. Nothing seems to fit.

I like to blog about how effective some tactics of ~~bedding~~woo-ing girls are. But I have yet to prove them so.

I like to blog about the importance of buddies(male or female) in everyone's life. But thats too cheesy.

I like to blog about how upset I am, over my failures at making academic excellence. But its been years since I left school and I might never go back again.

I like to blog about badly I need to find a way to make myself rich. But without a concrete moo-lah making strategy, I'll just sound like a wimp.

I like to blog about my romantic pursues. But I don't have much time for the night.

Excuses, excuses.

This blog has been up for a year now. Once again, I realise I do not like some people reading this blog. My skin is just not thick enough to blog about some scandals. I'm considering, setting up another blog, where I can promise my readers no-holds bar, un-censored writings and soul-flashing satisfaction for yours truly.

Yap. That summarises everything.

Roger out for the night.

Holiday...

2006-03-23T23:20:00.000+08:00

Even lovers need a holiday, so sung Peter Cetera. What more for friends and brothers?

Life may be peaceful though in a mundane kinda way. Still, flashbacks come, when in your closest's teasings, you realise how much that they do not know about you or maybe there is only so much they are willing to accept.

And you bend to fit their expectations. This shouldn't be the case. Being the non-confrontational kinda guy, I tend to keep mum. Worst case, I'll just walk off. But one thing is for sure, I never bear grudges, not to my dear-er ones anyway.

Maybe some holiday would be good.

I will be me once more.

Dawn...

2006-03-20T19:11:00.000+08:00

Cruising along the highway as the skylight changes in the wee hours of the break is always amazing.

Maybe I don't do this so often.

And this morning is beautiful.

Yes, Dawn. I lurve you.

Closest You Ever Get To Seeing Me...

2006-03-14T23:43:00.000+08:00

Following Finicky Feline's cue on Myheritage for celebrity-lookalike based on your uploaded picture.

And my result? 62% to Andy Lau.

Andy Lau and Jang Nara. Don't we make a fantastic pair, dearie?

P.S ~ Actually, the highest is 70% at Tyra Banks. But, nah... thats a fluke.

Oh yah, was at a Executive Drinking Joint with the guys just now. I spotted the girl next to my table and I challenged American Rooster to a wager, that she is an SIA air-stewardesss. Well, he was keen to(just a motivational factor for him to approach her). Well, we did not put the wager on the table.

But later on, when he had the chance, he spoke to her.

Turns out that she IS an air-stewardess.

Heh. These things don't escape my eyes. I'm watching.

Over Da Weekend and Monday...

2006-03-13T22:14:00.000+08:00

Caught the Date Movie over the weekend. Not proud of that, not ashamed either. Had some time to kill. It was just one of those typical slap-stick spoofs, but a few parts of it actually had me pretty entertained. First of all, being the hot Sophie Monk. And it was hilarious how they shamelessly repeat footages of her posing as Paris Hilton in the Carl Jr commercial. Also tickling was how they made Pussycat Doll's Don't Cha her song.

Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me...

Also like the way the way Ben Stiller's movies were spoofed.

A few good laughs, felt empty like I did not watch a movie even after 2 hours sitting inside the cinema. Well, its still better than Shaggy Dog any day. Ops. Yeah, I also caught that.

Today, I met Humpin' Edmo for dinner. Although I had been picking him up countless times from his workplace for the past one year, I still sent him this SMS,

"Ok. I'll see you at NYP at 6pm."

And the reply?

"NYP? My workplace is at SP!"

Half a pint of beer for the first person to guess what I was thinking.

After dinner and some errands, while we were waiting for some Precious to be collected, we ended up in a Road Show inside Great World City. Positioned right smack in front of the Panasonic Plasma TV, DVD player and their sound system, we were so mesmorised, as per many beside us. So impressed were we, that we immediately proceed to purchase the Jacky Cheung concert DVD, which, erm, wasn't sold at that Road Show. We went to "That CD Shop", where we told the hot sales-chick what we saw and heard, and she got it for us. Overall, we bought 3 Jacky Cheung CDs from "That CD Shop". Ironic how the road show managed to push sales of Jacky Cheung CDs rather than the entertainment system itself.

Well, can't speak too soon. For all we know, perhaps the DVD might sound so F-up once we got home that we might have to scramble back to purchase the Panasonic System.

Keeping fingers cross.

Update at 2300hrs: Humpin Edmo messaged,"Fucking Hell! The speakers make a lot of difference man!"

Ok... back to the Road Show.

War Is The Grim Reaper and More...

2006-03-08T20:09:00.000+08:00

Took a memory trip down the War History of Singapore, via this tour "Lion's Trail". A few destinations were covered. From Boat Quay to the Supreme Court, down to the Changi Museum.

Maybe I'm just too SNAG-gy, but certain points of the trip touched me emotionally. Narrations of the tragedies during WW2, coupled with the hard facts right in front of you, its tough not to feel.

There is a chapel at the Museum, or rather, the Museum was set-up at the chapel. I did not catch much of the starting lines during the narration but my attention was caught when it was mentioned that the artefact, a Cross, was made from empty bomb shells by a British soldier, Staff Sergeant Harold Stogden Raoc, who was held POW during the WW2. I can't remember details, but its goes around how he survived the war despite being sent to various zones, even the notorious Death Railway. After the war, he passed away on the plane home. His wife back in Europe had also died during the war thus leaving 3 orphans. It was only when one of their sons, George, became a grown-up that he learned the truth of his father's fate and also the will of this father that the Cross, is to be returned to Singapore. Thus, soon after, the Cross is sent back personally by George, to the chapel where it now resides, in what was a supposely very emotional trip for him. He had never gotten this close to his father before.

It is a humble chapel yet the message is very clear. War had taken lifes and torn families apart. You hear stories of these, and it easy to blame people, Japanese, who had invaded our land. And yet, at the very chapel, if you look carefully by the sides, were thousands of origami chains, sent by Japanese School Students, as condolences. Anger mellows into sorrows. You can only feel sorry for the events that had taken place. Messages were tagged on the board from people who had experienced WW2, who had felt the horror and remembered the pain.

How many of us had taken peace for granted? How many of us innately believe that War will never take place? In Singapore, we were brought up in an era of peace and War is just what we had read about in History text. It was all stories. It was all about memory work for grades.

Today, the War was real. It was all there, inside that chapel.

The Angel of Defiance...

2006-02-27T21:33:00.000+08:00

I couldn't take my eyes off her, all the while her phone was ringing. She acknowledged the call by shaking to the rhythm of the catchy tune, choosing not to answer the call, just so the tune doesn't cut.

She caught my glance,"好听 hor?"

I smiled and nodded in a few short, rapid cycles, never once taking my eyes off her. Her nonchalence on being stared at, ironically fueled by the attention. Theres something about her, the air of defiance. It only seemed that, with more attention, all the more she wants things her way. The allure of that quality appeals to me. Perhaps, its something I seek?

I followed her as she sashayed, leading the way down the stairs. Her phone rang once more and she proudly held it held in the air, grooving.

I'm so fucking turned-on.

The Things We Say...

2006-02-26T09:37:00.000+08:00

I was meeting up with a friend for a chat over lunch. And as per most common conversations, you end up talking about the people around you. That is the tricky part. You see, I don't like to see myself as a gossiper however it is human nature to cover certain "interesting" events and people around you. Its definite that we will talk about others all the time, but where is the line drawn between a gossip and an innocent "discussion". If there aien't any differentiation of gossip from pure "discussion", perhaps the best we can do, is to categorise them into "malicious" and "non-malign"?

How do we avoid any gossiping at all? I think, nada. How much of the things that spew from your tongues are based on your own experience? Even then, from your own pot, how fucking sure are you that its not biased or an err judgement? We think we are always right.

Also caught a movie last night. Can't remember the last time I laughed this hard in a cinema. Steve Martin is brilliant in Pink Panther. I'm still cracking from his slap-sticks.

Everyone is WatchingTalking About It...

2006-02-22T20:51:00.000+08:00

The latest no-brainer to get hits to your blog is to include the following key words in your entries.

Tammy, NYP, Sex, Scandal

Bound to get hits. We'll see. ;)

I have been meeting tons of people(some old, some new) for the past few days. People from all occupations and residing in every corner of Singapore. While Singapore may be a small island, it actually houses a population of approximately 4 million. No small feat. And while the various estates are actually pretty close to each other, I always have this perception that people living in different estates experience their lifestyle "differently". Don't ask me why. Its like a person living in Siglap, would render a totally differently "feeling ah" when staying in Toa Payoh. If given the same person, he might have taken on different paths if he had been staying in different estates.

And maybe I have not been meeting enough new acquaintances, but I find myself having to answer my status of currently being single, utmost times. I'm not sure if its the social norm to ask everyone you meet, on their status. When in Rome, f*** as the Romans do. I soon learned to engage First Strike.

A lot of them(older acquaintances) are surprised by my currently Single status, given my philandering ways. But, wait a minute. I'm not Casanova. I do meet a lot of girls, thats true. Romance count(dated/slightly interested/potentials) of 2005 was 13. Take away the "officials", I realise I do have a high turn-over rate. But I swear I do not flirt around. I do not waste my time and resources($).

My childhood friend of 2 decades downrightly branded me as a philanderer just for the very fact that I chat up girls. Here is a guy, who meets not more than 2 potential romantic interests through "decent" channels, and just married. He cannot imagine why someone like me, who is able to meet so many ladies, is without a Significant Other. He concluded that I must be either gay or having commitment issues.

Thing is, its just so difficult to find someone who connects totally. Chemistry, looks, character. Just 3, but its not easy to satisfy and I refuse to settle for less.

Trust me thought, the next one I meet whom I feel is a worthy catch, I will not let her out of my aperture.

Purest of Pain...

2006-02-15T17:36:00.000+08:00

Despite my current carefree state of mind, I'll be lying if I say I'm a walking, invulnerable heart of steel.

I realise there is only one thing more hurting than someone not loving you. Its when you realise that the other party chooses to believe that you don't love as much as you really did.

While the former cuts fast and sharp, the latter leaves a lingering pain that refuses to turn numb.

Billionaire is the next one to create an anasthetic for the heart.

Happy, Who Says I'm Not?...

2006-02-12T16:16:00.000+08:00

Believe it or not, but I have been really happy for the past one month. I remember this run since Christmas and it kinda grew since. There has been no major changes to my life, and I could not pin-point what has been making me happier lately.

Just then, a blog reader asked me whats wrong lately. He had the impression that I have been getting more antsy from my recent postings, when it was the other direction I had been heading. I went through my blog and I think he must be referring to the following postings:

How True Am I To My Blog
Wanna Be Part-Time Killer
Restrain
Road Leading To Hell

This must be it. All my "issues" dumped onto this blog, must have been cleansing my system. Blogging is truly therapeutic.

Don't believe the shite about all bloggers having lotsa issues. They must have been not blogging "enough". "Enough" is subjective, depending on severity of emotional baggages.

Road Leading To Hell...

2006-02-12T03:17:00.000+08:00

Since young, the saying "马路如虎口"(The roads are akin to the tiger's jaws) has been ingrinded onto me. The result is an extremely careful pedestrian. I look both ways before I cross the road. I never take a green light for granted and I always make sure the car slows down before I stick one foot forward. And if I recall, people around me demostrated similar level of caution when crossing.

Ever since I have been driving regularly, I have noticed that there are lots of people on the roads, waiting to throw their lifes away. Especially the youngsters. Just the day before, in one freaking single day, I encountered 3 incidents whereby they tried to shove their life into my hands.

Case 1, 2 boys walking along the middle of the road, back facing traffic and did not bother to turn around to check for vehicles at all(the traffic wasn't dead then).

Case 2, 4 bicycle riders crossing on their Red while I was supposed to be clear for turning. I, the rider on the Green actually has to stop, while they giggled and continue to ride SLOWLY.

Case 3, 1 boy crossing the road SLOWLY at the middle of an intersection when cars from 3 directions(me turning left, car going straight and car u-turning) all "stunned", and waited for him.

Is it the sheer arrogance of the younger generation that makes them feel that everything around owes them a living? Were they not taught about road etiquettes? Or are those monkeys just fucking stupid?

I remember one case last year where an expat jay-walked while jogging on a rainy day, he was fatally injured by an on-coming vehicle. While common senses and some light knowledge of traffic rules tell us that he threw his life away, the lady driver was ruled by court to award compensation(a few million if I recalled) to the deseased's family(presumably by law of Torts) for the loss of sole bread-winner. Shouldn't the man(sole bread-winner) himself be responsible for his own family when he chose to jay-walk. CB. Not the Green man or Red man that matters, but the White man.

To those who want to die, please commit suicide on your own accord. Quite inconsiderate to just barge out onto the road and 连累(drag down) unlucky drivers.

Misery Loves Company...

2006-02-10T00:06:00.000+08:00

I hate meetings. Most of the time, they are at best only 40% efficient at what they were set up to accomplish. The same shit will be thrown round the circle and many redundant points will be raise, in bids for the boss's attention.

I don't see why anyone would want to speak up at meetings if they have no concrete points to raise. They should all be like me. As a previous co-worker quoted,"XXX doesn't speak out a lot during meeting, but each time he says something, its going to be something." *Sorry for the blatant ego-trip here*

Anyway, back to my hatred for meetings. My visionary CEO has decided to triple our turnover with a revolutionary business shift. Hence he decided to rope in the brain power of the entire sales department, to churn out something so formidable that it will change the angle from which our world-wide organisation will see the Art of Money-Making. A week after he initiated his idea, I was already burning in auguish, trying to stay awake, over the numerous half-day meetings. Same ideas being spoken of, hour by hour.

Horror of horrors, when he unleashed his final whip in the form of a 2-days concentration camp. 2 fucking wholesome days of the same grind.

I thought I had it covered when I realise my reservist dates actually clashed with the intended date of the camp. While the most resilient smile has ceased among all faces in the board room, a glitch of it was slowly growing on mine.

One should never be too smug about good fortunes. Just when he asked,"Anyone has a problem with the date?"

I put on my most Hollywood-worthy troubled face,"My last 2 days of reservist happen to coincide with the camp dates."

Visionary CEO,"In that case, why not we shift the camp 2 days back? Everyone ok with it?"

"NOOOOOooo.... this is not happening!",I screamed within my skull.

Within seconds, my smug smile disappeared as glithes of it shifted to every other face in the board room.

Nabei... misery loves company.

Repeat Mode Forever...

2006-02-06T21:39:00.000+08:00

I thought my massive collection of "Digital Music" was gone for good when my beloved Toshiba Satellite crashed. So not. I managed to recover at least half of those back-ups on Humping Edmo's PC. See? Its always good to share your mp3s.

For so long, I have taken this song for granted as I instinctively click and drag it to my playlists. Some songs just comfort you so much that you don't mind playing them on Repeat. You know its forever when years later, you still play them on your "Playlist of the moment".

Some other of my Ever-Greens... maybe if you know them all, you know me. If you don't know any of them, you definitely too young for me.

Too Late Too Soon by Jon Secada
I Believe by Blessed Union of Soul
Lighting Crashes by Live
Water Runs Dry by Boyz II Men
Somebody's Crying by Chris Isaak
With or Without You by U2
I Lie For You And That's The Truth by Meatloaf (The MTV's a classic!)
High and Dry by Radiohead
All I Wanna Do Is Make Love to You by Heart
Fresh men by Verve

See any song you like too? Comments?

Zhng Da Car...

2006-02-06T00:45:00.000+08:00

Imagine the days when you buy a car and next thing you do, you are trying to hack into its computer system, modifying its source code and even downloading new softwares to expand your car's functionality?

Check this out. The things that you can do to a Toyota Prius.

Sunday EPL...

2006-02-05T20:57:00.000+08:00

Boxing Joe with a light entry.

Should Start Reflecting on Life...

2006-02-03T01:35:00.000+08:00

As if it was a sign, minutes after I posted the last entry. I came across a touching eulogy by Elvina for her friend Kelvin, who is an inspiring personality and Spinnee's comments on "Fearless" having a moral on the "Art" of life.

This 2 reads are in no way directly-related. But both set me back to reflect on life itself. At this hour, my thought are in a mess but I have enough in me to realise that we do need to sit and think about what really matters most in life. We don't have to be Saints but isn't our life worth at least a light review and scrutiny?

Now, I'm so ashamed of my negative vibes just moments ago. I know its justifiable of a human to blow off steam, but I realise that most of the time, I should be positive when it matters and when it makes a difference.

Restrain...

2006-02-03T00:40:00.000+08:00

Its so easy to get pissed over people's behaviour, behaviours which you yourself refrain from and yet there are people out there who think they run the world, people who commit those exact things to provoke.

I believe in civilisation. I believe in giving in sometimes to avoid direct confrontation because I know its important for at least one party to be thinking when the other party is not.

But, I am the one person you don't like to see when I really lose my temper. Those who have survived it will soon be acknowledged as my best friends while some I never ever hear of again. Yet, I know, I haven't blew my peak as yet. The scene that run through my mind and the things I'm tempted to perform in anger, are some of the stuffs I see in my darkest nightmare.

One very bad thing about me is that I may not voice out my displeasure immediately and I tend to let it build up.

In times of acute agitations, I would excuse myself. Get to a quiet corner for 5 minutes.

BREATH IN. BREATH OUT.

Its another day back on the "right" side.

Boxing Joe 来拜年。。。

2006-02-02T00:32:00.000+08:00

Boxing Joe has something to say after so long.

恭喜发财!!!

Dance and Dance CDs...

2006-02-01T01:05:00.000+08:00

Paul Van Dyk's Politics of Dancing 2 World Tour Session at Zouk last night was impressive. Might be the fat harvest of red packets, the crowd as a whole, seemed very very tolerant of the extremely-packed arena, thus making for an enjoyable session. The atmosphere at the dance floor was awesome, how the floor was worshipping Paul Van Dyk, I swear I never seen anything like this before.

Makes me wonder how Curious George and Jesua Freak could have possibly miss it. *sniggles*

Courtesy of a friend's late arrival, I had the opportunity to prowl the whole of HMV for CDs. I had shortlisted DJ Tiesto's latest Live recording and Fabriclive 25: High Contrast as worthy buys. Not cheap though, all of these non-main stream genres. Buying both would set me back by at least 70 bucks.

Was browsing through the CDs when my shopping method dawned on me. Other than known titles, how would I know which other unknown album could possibly be good enough for a test-drive? I would go by the CD Cover. Whichever album would capture my attention, would depend on how the cover flirts with my imagination. Most of the time, the cover is totally irrelevant of its musical content, but I must say, to some extent, the cover-induced mental staging for the set, does go abit of the way in the entire experience.

Me! Me! Me!

2006-01-31T12:04:00.000+08:00

I envy people with close family ties because that is something my family lacks. Over the days, as my grandparents started to "leave", the bond between my uncles and aunties begun to disintegrate. Not surprising as over the years, ties strained by "political" and financial conflicts gave way. This Lunar New Year, I have only received ang baos from my parents so far, so picture that. This Lunar New Year is more of a holiday break than the festive it used to represent. Sad, but I guess we can't have it all.

Been hearing a lot of "Gong Xi Fatt Cai" lately, and I guess I really need it for the coming year. So many things to finance and buy, so little money. I have a pretty good life. I never have to worry about basic necessities in my entire life, hence my desires are always luxury items.

For now, tops on my list are the iPod Nano and a new Desk top. Both of which, honestly speaking, I do not really need.

Why do I need the iPod Nano? Mr.Heng nailed it on my head when he quirped,"I can't understand why someone who drives, will need a iPod Nano." That makes perfect sense. My only excuse is that a Nano round my wrist, should be motivating enough to get me off my fat ass and revert to my jogging regime. Not a strong case, I know.

Why do I need the Desk Top? My former Desk Top, a Celeron 466, finally worked her dues. Actually, I believe its only the hard disk that crashed, I'll definitely try reformatting it and use her as a "Common WorkStation" for the family, but I figured that its also high time I get another faster system. While I'm currently using my company's laptop for personal usage, I'm not exactly comfortable enough to use it for World of Warcraft. So yeah, one more Desk Top its gonna be.

Been going through the Hardwarezone site, trying to research for my "High End" system and I realise that its forum is a true-geek's paradise. Literally Hardware Zone, all kinds of Hardware, even Cars, are included. Guess I have a new haven to frolick around.

You notice that its more of a "diary" entry I'm writing, pretty much unlike my normal "emo-" style and pretty much like those bimbo ranting blogs where its all about "Me! Me! Me!".

Thats how bored I am right now. But hey, its fun. Me! Me! Me!

Wanna-be Part-Time Killer...

2006-01-26T00:13:00.000+08:00

Last weekend, I caught the Fulltime Killer on the telly. Despite having seen it on the big screen years back, I sat out the show once more. Of course, there was quality casting with Andy Lau, Takeshi Sorimachi and that seriously-extremely-hot Kelly Lin but the plot wasn't much of a classic. What intrigued me most, was the killers' life.

Of course I'll be damned to think that there are real-life individuals who can carry out assasinations as smoothly as those hitmen in the show, and get away with it at the end of the day(everyday). Still... I'm intrigued.

Its like vampires. We know they don't exist, but we are still captivated by this legend and I believe, deep-down inside, we hope they do.

Why do we hope that they exist? BECAUSE... deep-down... we actually want to be them. Professional killers, vampires. By being them, we can live outside the boundaries of our current lifes, out of any legal or spiritual jurisdiction.

Think of those people, who have crossed your paths, that you want to lay to rest. The people whom your self-righteous ego would love to dispatch as one of those lowly scrums akin to cockroaches. You might not know them and n'mind if they have loved-ones of their own. Its your world to control and your cattles to slaughter. Every single maggot, you take them out, one by one, as if they are simply axed from the remaining script. No conscious to answer to and no super-cop to cut you down.

Now, if you will excuse me, I have some cockroaches to take care of at this very instance...

Indispensability...

2006-01-23T00:06:00.000+08:00

One of the things that I pick up in the corporate world, is that, no one person is indispensable. Which means to say, with or without the Ace, the team will still play on. After 3 years, I realise that this applies not just to work, but in sports... and relationships.

Some time back, I met up with a very special someone. Someone whom I was so much into, that I couldn't differentiate whether it was genuine liking or infatuation. So the story goes, no happily ever after.

By the time I met her again, I realise that I could do without her, as per the times I have done so.

And now I feel guilty. All my proclaims of eternal love, as it turns out to be, may not be quite as lengthy as I had meant. I still like her, but I know its not at the former peak of intensity, may not even ever will be.

Maybe time does heal all wounds. Maybe no one person is indispensable. Maybe infatuation is permanently disguised as eternal love.

How are we going to find out?

Toy Soldiers...

2006-01-22T11:20:00.000+08:00

"Step by step
Heart to heart
Left right left
We all fall down
Like toy soldiers" ~ Martika, Toy Soldiers

Life's a routine for most of us. I figured out why the hottest past-time in Singapore is movie-catching. Because within the 2 hours of screen time, you'll experience more adrenaline rush in that adventure, than whatever you'll probably going to get in the rest of your entire mundane life.

Out on a typical shopping trip, would you risk veering off-course while trying to tail a terrorist plotting a bomb blast, never to return home for the next month or so?(I'll just tip the police) Or would you venture back to the haunted house by yourself, in search of your best friend who had mysteriously disappeared there?(Again, I'll probably just leave it to the police)

I realise we are only looking for an escape, even if you are fully aware that its a temporary relieve. Perhaps, this relieve will contain your bored instincts for the next one week before you require another fix.

We change jobs, pick up new hobbies, change love interests, migrate to a foreign land. It'll still come back to square one, just a different routine. We still need to feed ourselves, pay our bills and commitment to family. Would we be happier being roaming, barbaric mercenaries?

Corporate civilisation's a by-product that we, the virus, are bringing to Earth to drain Mother Gael of her energy. Better economy, human growth, more energy requirement, more energy tapping.... until one day, we exhaust Mother Gael.

We are just marching on, like toy soldiers.

Dan Brown's Linearity...

2006-01-15T11:45:00.000+08:00

In trying to turn over a new leaf from my hedonistic days of pleasure, I have, in this case, tried to do so by turning pages. I have made the bookstore a primary stop in the lack of concrete plans.

I know I'm damn slow. I have only consumed Dan Brown's "The Da Vinci Code" within the last 2 months, when almost every self-respecting novel-geeks had done so eons ago and even the movie is about to be released. I had no doubt that it was going to be quite a read and am not disappointed. Personally, I find the plot pretty linear, none of the twists really shocked me, but you just have to keep on engulfing the pages to find out how exactly the twist will turn out to be. Its fiction, but references to historical facts and real artefacts, made me wish it wasn't. After all, it is pretty much in line with what I really feel about religion.

I believe that religion is man-made. I believe there is a God. Religion is simply Man's belief on how he can reach out to his God, the only being who holds the eternally elusive answer to Man's question on life. Life, the very cause of his creation. And due to this, like Robert Langdon in the story, I am unable to bring myself to commit to particular religion. Our longing for the actual spiritual truth prevents us from adhering to a set of rules when we spot a shade underneath the sun.

On recommendation of Shanghai Baby, I have also consumed "Angels and Demons". Its also entertaining, although I have slight doubts with regard to Dan Brown's creativity when I notice the uncanny similarity in the outline of both works.

SPOILERS ON "THE DA VINCI CODE" AND "ANGELS AND DEMONS" UP AHEAD...

1) Both plots are triggered by death of a "Grandmaster" at the very start of the story.
2) The lead will be bestowed a beautiful lady companion, who will be the daughter/granddaughter of the "Grandmaster" who just died, and he will be partially obstructed by a well-meaning "Military Man of Power". He will be assisted by a seemingly good-natured "Ally", who eventually turns out to be the "Evil Mastermind". His main nemesis is an ancient "Secret Society" with great connections and influences. "Evil Mastermind" will manipulate a "Pawn" in mould of the politically-incorrect stereotype of villians/outcast(in the form of an Albino and a Arab Black here). The "Pawn" will eventually die a tragic death.
3) Robert Langdon's charm is irresistable and he gets the gal at the end of the story.

I felt like I had read the same story twice over, although the elements differ. Nevertheless, was a worthy read.

Life Is time... Rain is just an add-on...

2006-01-08T22:38:00.000+08:00

We were given time which heals all wounds and yet it is this very gift that claims our youth, every single second.

Yes, time passes really fast. But to me, the past half year ended so prematurely, and I can't exact pin-point why so. Other than a more serious approach to work and a lighter stance on relationship dilemmas, I recall no major events. I realise a few good years of my life have been wasted obsessing on chiongs(clubbing) that I overlooked the elements that really matter most in having fun. Company, mood and music. Nowadays, without presence of at least 2 out of the 3 listed, I see no point in a night out. Hmmm... may make exemptions for "special" circumstances though. Like, you know... sometimes friends want you to aid someone else in improving their social circle, and its very "rude" to turn them down. =p

The past few days have been no different. Time is speeding as usual, except rain has been pouring like nobody else's business, like the Pacific Ocean is on top of us rather than under. But rain, I do like, especially when you are not in it.

Viewing the rain from the interior of a car and hearing sprays of "tappity taps" against the window and roof, can be really therapeutic. Of course, warm touch of Class95 playlists helps much. Me thinks its also very romantic. Company, mood and music. Presence of more than 2 of the 3 listed, makes for many points to be "trapped" within the car. Simple things like this, I enjoy too.

How True Am I To My Blog?...

2006-01-04T22:03:00.000+08:00

As I gazed at my screen, asking myself what I really wanted to blog about, I realise I can't do it.

Voice I have, I can't project. 2 pointers, I have just noted.

1) First of all, never get involved with blogger(s). Unless you want to exclude any emotional aspects from your postings.

2) Best not to let your friends know about your blog, unless you are prepared to do tons of explaination over mis-understood postings.

But this cannot go on. I have to get myself together and start giving two damns about what they would be reading. Its my blog or them. My blog's not ready to go just as yet.

I'll start with one.

First of all, I do not trust any blogger who hangs out at any cyber bar or whatsoever. Fuck off! Get your dosage of gossips within the circle itself and stop bothering me.

First Posting in 2006...

2006-01-02T02:41:00.000+08:00

It came as a shock to me, when I saw this article, which informs that the Korean melodrama, Il Mare is having a Hollywood version, starring Keanu Reeve and Sandra Bullock. Il Mare is one of those movies which left me with permanent impressions and as such, I felt kinda threatened when those impressions of the movie may be dented by the new version. I do not understand intentions for re-make other than for commercial inventives. Re-makes after two decades, when technology is able to resurrect the original movie in another mode altogether is a cause worthy, I feel. But a re-make after just 5 years!? And in the case of The Ring, that was way less than 5. While Hollywood has proven with track records that they are not excellent in re-capturing horrors, I can only pray that they fare much better in romance and cinematics since there is no way I can possibly stop the Il Mare re-make. Plus, I know that there will no way I can resist catching the re-make either.

Oh, here is another song which tells a story by James Blunt. I like the pain in his singing. Its a beautiful song. You're beautiful... you're beautiful...it's true...

James Blunt - Goodbye My Lover

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.

我一路向北...

2005-12-31T10:22:00.000+08:00

我一路向北离开有你的季节
你说你好累已无法再爱上谁
风在山路吹过往的画面全都是我不对
细数缠魁我伤你几回

我一路向北离开有你的季节
方向盘周围回转着我的后悔
我加速超越却甩不掉紧紧跟随的伤悲
细数缠魁我伤你几回
停止狼狈就让错纯粹

~ 一路向北,周杰伦

The above number has been playing on Repeat mode for the past few days. I think its the most appropriate one to sum up my year of 2005.

I'll just be a blank face, staring haplessly as the clock strikes 12 midnight.

I apologise to any readers who are unable to understand the Mandarin verses above. Its been a good year. Best wishes for the incoming one.

Heart, Feel & Embrace,
The Period

X'mas At the End of The Year...

2005-12-24T12:30:00.000+08:00

There is always something special when X'mas is in the air. The only festive which rhythms with love, coupled with the fact that it kinda marks the passing of another year. Bonuses is another high factor, cheeks just seem rosier when the pocket is fat.

Paint the streets with glittering lights of joy. Another time for reflection. A time to start pondering on expectations for the coming year. I think the most important word I have grasped this year, is "Priority". Living life the way I want is one thing, controlling how I want to live it is another. I control my activities and choice of lifestyle, not the other way round.

Thanks to everyone who has painted on my canvass for the past year in one way or another, be them good painters or a fuck-up ones.

Merry Christmas!

Rain, Kisses & Love,
The Period.

Now listening,
Last Christmas by Jimmy Eat World

Best Present this X'mas...

2005-12-23T18:31:00.000+08:00

The sales man must have recognised me after so many times of me sneaking up onto the display, such that he doesn't want to offer his help anymore for the very reason that he doesn't want to cause me more unnecessary embarressment. Countless times during the past few days, battling the insane traffic and crowd in the bustling street. I have been meaning to buy it for you, as there is nothing else I know which you may like, but with this... I can already see the sparkle in your eyes.

You must be happy this season, with all the gifts and love that will be showered on you. Without him, is your heart going to be warm or cold this x'mas? While I know there is no greater gift for me this x'mas than the opportunity to present this to you, Mr.Reality has told me that its not going to happen.

Its definitely not the price tag. I just lack the courage. Courage to face any more false hopes that I may still harbour. You will not understand, and this... I can understand.

I'm sorry.

Food For The Soul...

2005-12-18T16:56:00.000+08:00

I believe that music is food for the soul and that a wide preference of genre is always a healthy diet. At any one point though, there will always be 1 or 2 most preferred genre. I call it craving.

Been very much into Drum n' Bass, Trance and Chill. The feel, emotions when you let the music dictate your flow and blank out your thoughts, worries. No words, thats cool. I have always been one to be frugal on words.

Courtesy of Spinnee, I have managed to uncover a gem in Artistserver.com and Chris Huelsbeck is good.

Artistserver.com is like an Oasis in the middle of Cyberspace. Free! Free food for the Soul!

Also from Artistserver.com, the description for Trance,

Trance combines repetitive yet evolving melodies, multiple layers and threads, quantised patterns, and smooth/sweeping pads together to produce music that depends strongly on composition to keep everything clear and not mindlessly repetitive. Drums and percussion may be present in 4-on-the-floor style but are not given the same importance that they receive in genres such as breakbeat or drum’n’bass - if anything, they may lurk in the background or be brought in and out of the mix as the track demands. As the name suggests, trance aims for being hypnotic and trance-inducing - a way of using music to achieve an altered state of consciousness and, as such, shares musical roots with religious and spiritual music across the ages.

Is this how Nirvana feels like? Would I be floating around amidst the horizons of neverending sunsets, feeding on Ambient Trance? At the rate I'm going to Zouk, my Church @ Jiak Kim St., every weekend, it is truly becoming of a religion to me.

The sky is grey, the house is dark and cozy. Parents are lounging around in the living room(meaning they are not nagging). I'm in my deep abyss, accompanied by my Salt Crystal Lamp and Lava Lamp, "Sunday Brunch Buffet" has never been sweeter.

Try...

CHRIS HUELSBECK - Timeless Passion
B0UNC3 - Paradise on E
DONUTIX - The Second Sun (Part 1)

Feliz Navidad...

2005-12-13T22:07:00.000+08:00

7 years ago, in an obscure corner of Zouk...

"Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day, You gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special." ~ Last Christmas, Wham!

This year...

"I don't want a lot for Christmas
There's just one thing I need
I don't care about presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true...
All I want for Christmas
Is you..." ~ All I Want For Christmas, Mariah Carey

I Club With My Heart...

2005-12-10T13:16:00.000+08:00

The club at Esplanade called DXO. Anyone knows what it means? If no one does, then I assume it stands for "Durian XO". Sounds appropriate, don't you think? Its in Esplanade, which happens to be our "Durian" and XO happens to be a grade for the fruit. So instead of saying, XOD(XO Durian), like how we locals normally say it, they call it DXO, like how the ang moh calls it. Surname(aka last name) behind. Sound more high class that way hor?

Went to birthday party at DXO last night, which theoretically speaking, I crashed for the very reason that, all I consumed within, were free drinks on the host. Now that I realise it, I'm feeling damn pai sei(kinda means embarressed). Should have bought the birthday gal another Flaming Lamborghini at least. But if it makes me feel better, erm, she was lying on the couch, frontal down when I was leaving. So I guess, it makes no sense to buy her another one even if I wanted to. Heh heh heh...

There was a guest DJ from Oxford who was spinning Drum'n'Bass, and it was raunchy good. Crowd was starting to form just before I left after midnight. Overall, not a very packed arena but I actually like it that way. People there grooving, were there for the music, not just to pose. And we were mobbed. 3 girls in white & red outfits came blazing onto the dance floor. One of them, a tall chick wearing a lowly-slung from shoulder, mid-riff baring tee, I like!!! *Drool* They were distributing some sticker wrist-bands with their URL on it.

*Gal reaches out wrist-band to me*

"Whats that?" (I thought she was selling the wrist-band for charity)

"To show that you have GREAT TASTE!!"

(Yah! I have GREAT TASTE in music leh!)

I'm a very easily flattered person, that statement shot up to my head faster than a Belvedere tequila shot and I was still in a daze when she secured the wrist-band on me. It could have been a S&M handcuff round my wrist and I might not even have resisted.

Here's their site. They are cool. Red Mob. Think its a campaign organised by Singtel to show that they are a wholly cool organisation, or they might just be sponsored by Singtel. Former more likely. Nevertheless, the chicks, yeah, they're cool...and Hawt too!

Adjourned to Phuture and Zouk for another lesson in a "Not Recommended" clubbing practise. Its like drinking red wine. You move on to deeper favours just so you can appreciate every single one of them in order, likewise for a night..the tempo should get faster, not slower. Progressive House, Progressive House... Have you ever heard of Degressive House? No right? Like say... R'n'B, Break beats, some Progressive House and Drum'n' Bass. I know people don't eat it this way, but just as an EXAMPLE! After tasting Drum'n'Bass at DXO for round 1, the rest of the night left me with a lingering yearn for the D'n'B @ DXO. Kinda dampens the Zouk experience slightly.

N'mind. You3 Gen1(direct translation meaning, have root, go figure), our Pharoah of MOS(Ministry of Sound) @ Clarke Quay, who has re-discovered Tripleperiod, has promised us a solid table, at a prestigious location for its hard launch on the 16th December.

In case you forget further details about our discussion. This is what I put forth. One table, perenially "Reserved" for YouGen's friends. So next time, at the door, your brothers just need to say "YouGen's table", and they can skip all queue, bomb da bar and slaughter chicks in da house. How sei(stylo milo) would that be? In return, erm, you will get our presense in the club. I'm not sure how much that helps though.

Anyway, last night, I witnessed an embrace. 10 seconds. An embrace without words, the heart speaks. An embrace, celebrating whatever romance there had been, a journey worthy of remembrance. It said "Thank you for having walked with me, hand-in-hand." It makes the relationship "last" forever.

Is that how relationships should end? Why should most break-ups end up in scars and lingering effects that carries over to the parties' next relationship, like a nuclear fissure reaction? Thats not right!

People, we should all learn the right way to love. Tripleperiod, henceforth known as, The Period, will teach you, as he clubs with his heart...

mrbrown for Best Asian Blog...

2005-12-08T22:14:00.000+08:00

The time has come to take a stand.

Best Asian Weblog and I'm with mrbrown for the following reasons.

1) There are only 3 blogs out of the list that ring a bell.
2) Its the only one of the 3 that I like.

Simple.

Suddenly, I'm thinking of churning out a very personal entry to tell all why I do not like the other 2 blogs. While I can already imagine how personal it can get and how much that would guarantee people sitting up and take notice, it would also involve telling people alot of things, extremely private and personal stuffs inclusive.

Very dire consequences. Very.

Anyway, mrbrown. Whose with me?