Buy Me Love and Drinks Tonight...

The last post was all bullshit when you know that you are still downing pints by the double 2 days later.

2 days ago at my favourite table of my favourite bar, my hardcore day-light drinking kaki pointed out to me that my issues always projects their presense after the 3rd glass. Always the 3rd glass.

Can't deny that drinking doesn't solve any problem when its deep inside of you. It does make you feel good as long as you keep on talking and laughing... once external conversations stop and you start talking to yourself. It feels worse than before.

Thats probably the reason why I have been taking to Saturday noon-time drinking with my hardcore daylight drinking kaki. In the day, you feel alive. In the day, it feels bright. In the day, the darkness in your soul doesn't shine. Happy you are, jolly as a Sun til he sets and the vampire in your soul starts leeching on you.

It also occurs to me that while I have been boozing regularly, I'm always in a half-fucked situation. I have been going home earlier and always never really having my thirst for liquor totally satisfied. Leaving my mind in a more vulnerable position as I mentally-fuck myself throughout the rest of the night. On the other hand, my inhibitions are simply piling on the frustrations.

Its time I venture further from that zone lest I'll be stuck in this vicous cycle forever.

I want to get drunk tonight.

First one to call with offers of 1st two pints free, gets my love, valid for one night only.